I've never really dated before, gave everything to professional projects. Great for becoming myself, my life is unusual and, well, pretty cool. But I did fall into relationships without enough intention or vetting. So reading FDS now is illuminating as I test dating for the first time, sort of practicing on OLD.
The ones I've matched with want to move to video or voice right away, and behave strangely when I don't comply. If I had not been reading here, I might have taken their behavior personally.
First one pressured for voice after about three texts: "because I don't want to text forever, let's see if we have chemistry." I stated I prefer a few days or week or so (Covid!) to share dealbreakers or other info first. After barely two more texts, he asked again, so I got specific, said, let's first tell more *before* evoking chemistry. For instance, maybe you want to know that my job can take me overseas for months at a time (my profile job title indicates this), and that I *may* next year be selected for an analog space mission (on earth). I could understand this giving a person pause, but he angrily accused me of "moral dereliction" for not putting exactly that info in the profile, and said I should not be dating at all! Thanks to FDS I block and delete. And laugh.
Next one, after a mere two texts, rang through the video. Without asking first. So I did not answer. Even my closest friends set a time to call. I write a bit later that I am new to all this, let's share some more info, then set a time for a call. His answer the very next day: "I have met someone special and decided to put my all into that. Good luck to you in these crazy times." No skin off my nose, but before FDS I might have wasted time answering, "Good luck to you both, as you seem impatient and confused :)" It even occurs to me that might have been an attempt to triangulate me into compliance, but who cares, right? Block, delete, laugh.
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