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I had the same issue with my ex. Driving illegally whilst sleep deprived with friends. Smoking weed every day with them when he was on a visa from a country where even alcohol is illegal. We fought a lot about his irresponsibility. His friends will go back to their countries after coronavirus and he'll realise there's more to life than smoking weed and driving fast cars with your immature friends and will probably hit me up..
I've been reading several books which say the same thing - men are like children, the more you nag, the more likely they are to rebel and do what you tell them not to. Like toddlers, they also try to push you and see how far they can go. The best course of action is to ignore them, don't give them the reaction. That's not to say you accept bad behaviour, you just ignore it and silently move on. Actions work on men, not words.
However, you want to break it off, and for good reason, I don't think you need to wait until face to face to break it off since you're far apart right now. I think a phone call is fine in this case, much preferable to a text message. You could say something like "I've realised we are much different people and not a match", instead of "nagging" and saying it's because of his behaviour. That way you show that you're above him and his childish behaviour and have self-respect.
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