Women lack it entirely.

I make this post because of what happened to me Saturday night.

It’s just before midnight. I’m settled in, chillin in my pajamas, playing some good ole PC games and geeking out after a long week at work. I hear a bunch of tapping, like finger nails, on my window. It freaked me the fuck out. I live alone, and all of my good friends know to text or call me before they come by. It’s common courtesy to me because I loathe unwanted guests. I’m a gun owner, and if it’s late at night and I hear a knocking I’m going to have a gun hidden on me for good measure when I answer the door.

I slowly open the door and it’s this drunk bitch. Probably looked mildly attractive before she got slosh fuckin’ drunk at the bar. Looked like she just got rode hard and put away wet. I say “uhm yeah? You alright? What’s up? You lost? Why are you out here knocking on my window when I have a door?” Cause I honestly don’t know who the fuck this is, plus I’m just pissed because I fucking loathe rude people, especially ones ignorant enough to go knocking on people’s windows late at night.

And she bluntly goes “hey can you come out here and jump my car?”

I was fucking shocked at first, because all I could think was is this bitch fuckin’ serious? It’s after midnight and dark as fuck and I’m Just supposed to jump when she asks. I can only imagine how many simps she’s done that to who instantly came to her beckoning call.

Anyway, I say “no sorry, it’s late, I don’t feel like it, and I don’t feel comfortable doing that. Call a cab. Have a good one.”

She just goes “wow fuck you too then!”

So I close the door. Call the police. Tell them a drunk woman was knocking on my windows of my home, got irate when I refused to jump her car, and told them how she has had way too much to drink and should not be on the road. Ten minutes later I see police lights outside. They caught her as she was trying to pull out of the drive. Guess her car started? Or maybe a neighbor gave her a jump?. Idk. All I saw after that was her being pulled from her vehicle and being arrested.

Checkmate, bitch. Have fun with that D.U.I.

(For anyone confused, I live in a subdivision with relatively close neighbors.)