I have always had trouble setting boundaries and expectations, thus I have been a blue pill doormat forever. This last weekend, I was out and about running some errands for some house projects that I am working on. When I got home, I was talking with my wife about can't even remember, and in walks my daughter and interrupts because she needs to show me something right at that minute. The wife also interrupts me to tell me that I should go with the daughter to see what it is.

I find this behavior very disrespectful. It tells my children that dad doesn't matter. I didn't say anything until later after my kids had gone to sleep. I told her that I find that very disrespectful and I won't have that. Our kids can wait until mom and dad are done having their conversation. It will not kill them.

I went further and told her that we need to prioritize our relationship higher than our children's. I told her that doesn't mean that we neglect them in favor of us, that rather, if we are happy with each other, the kids will see that and they will be less likely to be in shitty relationships when they grow up.

Then came the tears and emotions which I remained calm and collected. Said, they way we are doing things now, isn't working and we will do better. She finished with, I am not sure I can live up to all of your expectations. Well, she at least knows what they are now.

Went out to dinner the following day and when we got to the restaurant, she told the kids that she would be sitting next to dad. They typically turn this into world war II over who sits next to mom. It was one of the nicest family dinners out that we have ever had. The kids behaved and it was, just, nice.

Not sure that I was perfect with this one, but at least I have the feeling I am making progress.