A coworker of mine saw that I replied to a tweet on Eliminate violence against women day by @thinkprogress. Saying that we should end violence against everyone.

My coworker saw this and tweeted at me in disagreement. Twitter's character limit was too short so I took the conversation to text messages and it did not go well.

I don't know if it would be respectful or not to post the conversation here? (it is here) And my interest at this point isn't even about winning a debate. I don't believe she would allow herself to change her mind. Though I'd love to be wrong about that.

I wouldn't like the idea of a "End violence against men day" either. I don't like listing off stats about ways in which men suffer in greater numbers than women. (though she was quick to do this for the reverse) Because I think statistics distract from the principle of nonviolence. Greater numbers are irrelevant.

Though she expects me to recognize statistics as arguments, and not have them feel like that negated my own suffering from domestic violence. (which she is aware of) But if I flipped some stats the other way, she admits she would feel negated and not respond to them positively.

Really where I lay would be. How do I honor the strong feelings she obviously has, and i won't deny her feelings, I believe they are real. While at the same time honoring what is alive within myself? As it stands, one of us would have to censor themself in order to allow the other person to feel heard. And that would not meet my need for authenticity.

This isn't the first ideological conflict we've had. Politically we are at a head too.

All these things aside. I enjoy working with this person actually. She's talented and brilliant.

I'd like to take a nonviolent communication (NVC) approach with this. But don't immediately see the language that would best demonstrate that both of our needs can be met.

Hopefully I explained this well enough, though I can answer questions if you have any.

Help? How do I smooth this out?