How to prevent getting raped/molested as a man and how to heal after the trauma?

IntroductionNew3421 · 2021-11-09T12:28:36+00:00

I guess most of the rules for women apply to men also, but I would add, don't date woman that are into bdsm or strange torture things.

A friend of mine went out with a girl on tinder a long time ago that was into some weird things. He agreed for her to chain him up in one of those swing things thinking she was going to edge him or something. She then proceeded to put a ball in his mouth and pegged him.

He tried to scream and tried to get loose but he couldn't. Afterwards she said she didn't think he wouldn't like it. He said he was too ashamed to go to the police.

So watch out who you are letting tie you up.

OldEgalitarianMRA · 2021-11-09T12:36:54+00:00

Don't get pissed drunk. That's when I was taken advantage of. I did the drinking, I take the responsibility but by todays standards I was raped. I clearly said no. Then woke up next to a ham beast I'd been avoiding all night.

2021-11-09T12:51:18+00:00

I always assumed that was because the things that apply to them also work for us the other way around:

Don't trust drinks from female strangers (or male for that matter)
Avoid situations where the person can pull a weapon on you
Don't walk off as the only man with a group of women
Don't agree to anything you're not comfortable with

etc.

There are a few situations where we could use specific advice though, like calling women out for touching us inappropriately even if we think it would be ridiculed.

hardturkeycider · 2021-11-09T13:45:45+00:00

Don't put yourself in a vulnerable position around people you don't trust, i guess. Drunk, high, whatever. Especially at strange parties.

Bara-enthusiast · 2021-11-09T22:13:03+00:00

As a victim I can tell you what to do in some cases

Of blackmailed, always have a hidden cam on you.

Always keep am eye on your drink or don't continue drinking.

Women usually rape by drugging or blackmailing you.

Never get yourself physically restrained.

If she is forcing herself, and not listening to no, deck her as hard as you can. Anything to get her off you.

For recovery:

Here it's trickier but. If you have that cam at least you may have footage.

Don't hide in denial.

Seek a therapist - preferably man. I'd say women usually won't help

Don't go for revenge: the rapist label doesn't stick to women and wont ruin their rep. Try to get legal justice... If not take as much money as you can from her.

Lasttoflinch · 2021-11-09T14:48:46+00:00

Know that (and live as if) the notion and necessity of giving consent applies equally to everyone, not just women. Seems easy on the surface but many men, including male victims of SA and my previous self, have trouble with this.

Know that the physical state one is in does not equates to or implies consent. Having a hard on ≠ consent. Ejaculation from being sexually assaulted ≠ consent. Unfortunately, aside from general society, many male victims of SA who exhibited these characteristics are not able to fully recognise that they have been victimised.

Call out inappropriate sexual contact and remarks impartially. All individuals should be respected regardless of their gender, or any other innate characteristics.

If you are a victim of SA, the first step to healing is to recognise the fact that you have been violated (Took me quite a while).

If you were SAed, know that there is no definitive right or wrong ways to move forward. You decide whether you want to seek legal redress, confront your perpetrator, forgive your perpetrator etc.

Magical-Hummus · 2021-11-09T15:17:04+00:00

Not getting intimate with strangers is a good first step.

Fafneir_here · 2021-11-10T02:32:27+00:00

I think that the situations in which men are raped are alot different than a women's. Obviously, that's not always the case but it might be why it's harder to find a guide.

Correct me if I'm wrong but aren't most men raped by someone there close with like there partner or a family member, through means of sexual manipulation/coercion?

OriginalGreedy · 2021-11-09T21:41:45+00:00

If you are old enough, carry a firearm after learning how to do so safely. Learn situational awareness. Take it seriously.

As for recovery, No idea.

miladiashe · 2021-11-09T23:40:07+00:00

is 'prevent rape' is possible?

i thought nothing can do on victim's side

Someone_Somewhere1 · 2021-11-09T16:31:01+00:00

Why are u asking how to prevent getting raped? It’s not like it’s something that happens on a daily basis, 99.99% of the time you are not at risk. Moreover, no human being can 100% prevent this as it can happen anytime anywhere

Also, its not any different from women.

I’ll be downvoted, but let me tell you I’m not a feminist, and I support this subreddit, and I oppose the modern feminist movement (I just support equality.)

Title	How to prevent getting raped/molested as a man and how to heal after the trauma?
Author	RandomHuman2354
Upvotes	118
Comments	18
Date	November 9, 2021 11:59 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/qq255r/how_to_prevent_getting_rapedmolested_as_a_man_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/how-to-prevent-getting-rapedmolested-as-a-man-and.1085068 https://theredarchive.com/post/1085068