Sad

former_farmer · 2025-07-16T23:44:30+00:00

For a big % of women, a man needs to meet certain requisites. They think they are easy to fulfill. But they are not. Also bad men with bad behavior, bad boy attitude etc, sometimes win even if they are bad candidates because a lot of women are attracted to them.

This leaves good young men very lonely. They still can't produce much money, and they want to be nice, stay out of drugs and bad influences. They are seen as boring. They are in desperation mode. Hence they approach everything that moves trying to find love.

It's important to let them know that what's going on is not fair and that they should do the best they can to improve their lives without being enslaved to a bad relationship.

Red-Pilled-Aussie · 2025-07-17T08:37:36+00:00

Hypergamy in women increases every year. It started with them only dating the top 20% of men 15 years ago but today we are at the top 5%. This means more men miss out with each passing year. As a result, more men start considering women they previously wouldn’t - this includes single mothers and women over 40. I’ve also been hearing reports of women in their 40’s dating younger men in their 20’s. This almost never used to happen 20 years ago.

Liquorandstickher · 2025-07-16T23:49:59+00:00

At 36 year old there’s so little options. If I don’t date younger, or if I want to date a woman my age they typically already have them and say to me “if you don’t want kids? Why would you want to date one with one”

I have found that left leaning, cat ladies are my sweet spot but they don’t typical like a clean cut bluecollar boy.

It’s hard out here. Plus women have so many options on dating apps. It’s like 75% men, so one slip and they’re on to the next. I had a girl block me because I left her on read.

i_am_an_enigma · 2025-07-17T12:28:00+00:00

THis is an ignorant statement, i won't lie

AndyRoo2023 · 2025-07-17T17:29:20+00:00

Really don't know what the point of your post is beyond your own anecdotal experience, that you seem to be extrapolating to 'men' in general.

World-Three · 2025-07-16T23:47:30+00:00

Self worth and how the typical response is.

Think about money. If money wasn't considered legal tender and had wavering amounts of value, everyone would be in a hurry to get rid of it to someone who was willing to buy it or even remotely interested in buying it... Men are taught by the world that they have no appreciated value, so they're basically running around trying to sell to anyone who would buy something the world seems to want them to do for free.

It's very unhealthy because just like your situation. You probably let him down easy because you have someone. To him, that probably felt better than how a single woman can react. So in direct comparison he might feel like he has a better chance with you because you reacted better about it.

It's actually not male exclusive. If women still felt societally unattractive, they'd behave similarly. It's why they had to make terms like chubby chaser and etc to shame men from playing life on easy and dealing with easier women.

Regardless. If men were treated better they'd likely have better standards. People say you're only as good as the company you keep, but if you can't get anyone in your corner... You start compromising... I'd imagine that's what this is.

ImaginaryComb821 · 2025-07-17T05:43:34+00:00

It's not a thought or a feeling. It's biological imperative. We are not this free beings born with a blank slate. We come programmed and hormonally adapted. Women with child can have more children. So there's less risk as you've done the deed before and you're fertile . Step out of this human existence frame and just look above like a group of beings was trying to survive as species. Ignore the political and existential fatalism and the opinion that humans are a virus or cancer. Just step back and be objective. Why would a life want to survive?

Glassyeyebrian · 2025-07-17T14:21:40+00:00

Most of them are probably desperate people who try to get some coochie.

Dark_Prince_of_Chaos · 2025-07-17T16:12:17+00:00

Loneliness.

TrainingGap2103 · 2025-07-16T23:52:37+00:00

Honestly, soooo many men don't have options and rarely ever get to feel desired. It can be difficult to have good self esteem or be romantically confident when that's what you're working with.

Almost all men will barely be thrown a bone (no joke intended) on dating apps, and, in real life, men feel like they have to always be the ones chasing women or trying to win women's favour. Research says both genders, on average, would prefer being approached over doing the approaching and that seems super obvious - being approached makes you feel like you're desired - approaching is nerve wracking and does not make you feel like the prize. This isn't helped by women (due to evolutionary biology - it's not your fault) being more picky than men.

I hear red pill people say women "hit the wall (lose their attractiveness)" at 30 but that is not what I've seen. I know conventionally unattractive 40 year old women who get dates like it's the easiest thing in the world to do. I also know conventionally unattractive single mothers who have no issues dating.

Tldr & conclusion: getting dates is very difficult for tonnes of men. They can't really rely on dating apps, and approaching is brutal (combined with how they're scared of being socially labeled as a creep or worse consequences if they approach). Most men also don't feel desired (and honestly aren't that desired). It's no wonder so many men struggle with self-esteem in dating.

Fun_Butterfly_420 · 2025-07-17T21:39:02+00:00

Whoa I’m 26 and never even had a girlfriend before

throwaway0408800 · 2025-07-17T05:36:55+00:00

Men become desperate because social architects make it that way. The policies, laws, and media are all orchestrated to promote divorce, simping, and male loneliness (in particular). Unfortunately, many men fall into the trap of blaming women, instead of those creating the agenda.

Specialist_Pea_8491 · 2025-07-17T00:08:37+00:00

Majority of younger men have little to no options for dating now. Especially in this economy they are unlikely to have their own place and finances. Meanwhile young women have dating on easy mode. Therefore many men are desperate and have eliminated any standards.

Radiant_Analysis_524 · 2025-07-17T02:48:54+00:00

The truth is, this issue is way more complicated than it seems. It’s not something you can explain in a simple answer. A lot of people in the thread have already covered it from different perspectives, so I’ll just say this—it mostly comes down to how the US dating market today. More than 70% of men aren’t even engaging in dating anymore. Women have become far more selective than they were 20 years ago, and the bar is set so high now that even decent, hardworking men with good values don’t feel like they have a chance. Most of us don’t even bother trying anymore because we already know we’ll be rejected.

What’s disheartening is seeing average women confidently demand top-tier men, while those same men wouldn’t even be considered if the roles were reversed. And there’s this pattern where women seem drawn to “bad boys”—men with criminal records or unstable lives—because they feel emotionally connected to their vulnerability. That leaves the rest of us, the ones willing to commit, build something real, even accept partners with children, just sitting on the sidelines.

Honestly, it feels hopeless. On dating apps, an average guy’s chances are almost nonexistent. Most profiles are either spam, OnlyFans promotions, women who are already dating someone, or just looking for male attention. It’s a miserable experience. At this point, it’s hard not to feel like giving up is the only rational choice.

CannIPetThatDog · 2026-05-09T19:07:22+00:00

This is such a PMAB take.

Title	Sad
Author	dreadheadbrir
Upvotes	66
Comments	26
Date	July 16, 2025 10:19 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1m1qe75/sad/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/sad.1557346 https://theredarchive.com/post/1557346

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