What can I do to help men?

iainmf · 2017-01-28T22:47:51+00:00

Little things like sticking up for men when people say all men are idiots or that women are better than men is a good place to start. No need to be preachy about it, you could just say something like "not that old trope again ".

The other thing to do is learn more about men's issues. So if someone asks you about it you can give an informed answer.

MRA-automatron-2kb · 2017-01-28T23:36:07+00:00

See boys - men as humans too.

Critically think about what feminists say and look at gendered double standards from the man's point of view.

For your social science projects, do research and essays or class presentations on MRA issues.

Thanks for taking an interest in MRA issues.

rcc737 · 2017-01-29T00:19:13+00:00

A bit of background/perspective.

I'm a stay at home dad with a 13 year old daughter and 11 year old son. Keeping my kids safe from harm is #1 in my book.

Men by nature are not out to get you. Please don't act like we are. Yes you should keep yourself safe but being scared of men like we're the boogeyman just because we're men is the wrong way to go about things.

How to show compassion. Say hello, good morning, good afternoon, good evening or whatever salutation you prefer. Even the weird duck has feelings and likes to feel noticed. This doesn't mean become best friends with a 40 something year old guy but "Hi" goes a long way.

If you see/hear something wrong don't be afraid to speak up. This goes for both men and women. We don't visit this sub to thump our proverbial chest and try to dominate women but rather we simply want equality in all aspects of life. Please please please do NOT pick a single issue or instance where a man had his rights trampled and turn it into the end of earth. Rather if you see/hear something educate yourself about as much as you can about whatever "it" is before opening your mouth. I learned many years ago that you learn more by reading/listening than you do by writing/talking.

Simply help move a mountain by using your one bucket; don't think you can/need to move that mountain by yourself.

splodgenessabounds · 2017-01-30T10:22:03+00:00

Do any of you have any suggestions on how I can better show compassion for men?

From the way you write, I don't think you need to - you seem to have the principles well covered already. What you might like to think about is how you can influence others around you.

This doesn't mean doing a lot of ranting and railing at others and getting all righteous and whatnot - that just annoys people and annoyed people are rubbish listeners. But you can influence them - the next time you hear someone say something about men and boys that you know (or suspect) is probably gibberish, challenge them: "Are you sure about that [statment/ fact/ "truth"]? Where did you hear that?" and so on. Then provide them with evidence that counters their assertion - even if they won't accept your evidence, you've at least made them stop and think.

A couple of months or so back, there was a rash of posts by high school/ college students seeking help with presentations they were doing for class on "controversial" subjects, in this case men's rights. It's worth having a dig around in the achives for these posts, since at least some of them were around your age and were similarly switched-on.

Here's a youtube vid one young chap did for his assignment: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6W1N_iq7YTg

TigPlaze · 2017-01-29T04:15:20+00:00

Hi, Decky. First, I'm amazed by your compassion at such a young age. You deserve a lot of credit for that. I don't have anything earth shattering, but I will say you can always listen to another man without judging him.

levelate · 2017-01-29T02:13:55+00:00

seems you're onto a good start, at only 15, you should be applauded.

my advise is to listen to people, not men, not women, but people, then make up your own mind, based on the data you have.

EricAllonde · 2017-01-29T04:41:13+00:00

Thank you for your empathy.

I think there's one very important thing you can do.

Schools and universities are very anti-male environments. A majority of the teachers hold very Liberal political views, which often include strong feminist and misandrist attitudes. Over the last decade or so, nearly all of the teachers and professors with contrary views have been forced out, leaving an environment with an unhealthy lack of balance in its beliefs and opinions.

In coming years, there will be times when your classmates, friends, peer group and perhaps even your teachers as well start up with a round of extreme man-bashing. Don't blame them, they'll just be echoing the misandry that their schooling has fed to them.

But your role is important, because you may be the only person there with a balanced view, the only person who knows the facts. You may be the only person who can speak up in defense of men when the prevailing mood is misandry.

I see some young men who come out of the education system as broken men, thinking there's something wrong with them just because they're male. They apologise and grovel when they've done absolutely nothing wrong, they've simply been beaten down by 12 or 16 years of misandry forced upon them along with their schooling. What sort of future do those poor young men have, when they've been indoctrinated to be ashamed of who they are?

Those boys - your classmates - are the ones who need your help, and they need it badly. They need you to speak up when everyone else is spouting casual misandry, yet again, like it's just a normal and accepted thing. They need to hear the other side, they need to know that the lies they're hearing about men, over and over, are just that: lies.

There may not be anything that you can do today, but please just watch and listen to what's being said about men in your school and in your university in the future, and speak up when necessary. The next generation of young men need you to. Thanks.

-redditardation- · 2017-02-26T11:54:18+00:00

I think a big part is countering the feminist narrative and even more so their misleading and destructive statistics and practices.

I'd probably familiarize myself with some basic anti-feminist stuff and get good at making a short clear response along with keeping some sources on your mobile.

The main ones I'd recommend would be:

The wage gap. Some good outlines on how it is actually an earnings gap not a wage gap. Some of the more 'knowledgable' will likely retort with the unpaid wage gap where women do more domestic chores but highlight how this is often almost exactly countered by additional time worked by men and have some sources. A follow on from this could be the tax gap and health gap which are very much real. These are that men pay the majority of income tax and this gets redistributed more significantly to women. The stats on gendered taxes should be easy to find and a recent study in New Zealand found that over a lifetime effectively only men as a group actually pay tax.
Female objectification. Get pictures of your average model dude, and tall guy and then show girls some pictures of normal guys. Highlight how much of the fashion industry is gay and it isn't the evil CIS white men that make this happen.
Rape culture. Whenever a misleading rape study comes out learn about it and know what was wrong with it to highlight the lies by omission or loaded questioning. If you're in the US it is worth mentioning that men are suspected to be the primary victims of rape if you include prison rape. If they counter with but men are doing them remind them that we don't care who does the crime we care about the victim. Women murdering women isn't excused neither should men raping men.

Another thing that I guess could be pretty awesome is to be buds with some guys. A lot of guys are pretty lonely and thanks to the mixed signals from society have no idea what to do. Let them know that most girls want a man and tell them when they have been friend zoned.

Title	What can I do to help men?
Author	Deckyleaf
Upvotes	13
Comments	18
Date	January 28, 2017 3:39 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/5qo4fu/what_can_i_do_to_help_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/what-can-i-do-to-help-men.933099 https://theredarchive.com/post/933099

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