Best OLD stories

planejane · 2019-10-17T02:25:53+00:00

I had a stalker from getting catfished on OKC. Was on my college campus studying and he told me after the fact he was there doing a light installation or something and saw me from afar; described my clothes and bag and everything. Turns out he was a lonely fat dude looking to step out on his wife; I'm glad we never really met but I did feel kinda sorry for him as well as her.

Had an obese and abrasive med student tell me I would be lucky to date him after I politely declined his information.

Went on a date with a guy who was cute in his photos but IRL decided to show me photos of his cats and talked about how content he was in his mom's basement. Definite autist. I lasted 30 minutes then mumbled something about going back to my car; doubled back into the bar and flirted with the bartender for an hour.

Went out with who I'm pretty sure was an actual narcissist who talked about how cool he was and hated his job and basically how he was awesome and everyone else sucks. Got an emergency escape phonecall from my sister, paid for my drink, and then he gives me the saddest most puppydog look and says, "we're not going to do this again, are we? I'm sorry." Just a weird 180 experience in a matter of 2h.

Chatted with a real cute dude who I actually became friends with for a while, but he technically ghosted on our first date because he found out I was 5'10 (he's 5'6.5). Bumped into him later though mutual friends and had a good laugh about it--he's married to a very sweet petite girl now.

darudeboysandstorm · 2019-10-17T01:24:24+00:00

I used online dating way way back in the nineties when it was brand new. Nobody had pictures. I did but I loved computers and spent $300 90's bucks on a scanner. It was soooooo much better. Lacking pictures people sent very long well thought out messages and replied far more often. I met a lot of very cute girls.

Now this isn't my worst online date story. That would be going bowling with a girl who was actually 16, taking her to the methadone clinic, and meeting her 45 year old strung out baby daddy and then being asked if I wanted to run a train on her. I declined. But that is a true story.

So here's the story I'll tell. I met a girl who had pictures!! Very very rare back then and oh my God she was super cute! We talked for a month about everything got along so well made a date to go bowling (young me was an avid 260 league bowler).

I was psyched for this date. Got a haircut, dressed to the nines, and drove out to pick her up. Knocked on the door, she answered, and I was floored. She looked even better in person. I said, "hi".

She stood their staring at me.

I said, "hi", again.

She stood there looking at me like I was crazy. After a moment of pause she says, "can I help you?"

"It's me (whatever username I got now)"

Blank stare

"from whatever online dating site?"

She gets a big smile, says, "Oh!!!"

"you're here for my sister!"

Mind blanks, cute girl moves to the side and sister waddles towards the door. Massively obese girl, unkempt, bad skin, and carrying a vase of those pirouette coffee cookie sticks, munching them down.

WHAT

Uh hello? I can't even remember the rest hmm. She invited me in I walked in, she invited me to sit down. I sat down. She asked me if I wanted one of those cookies. She was munching them faster and faster and had to open a second container. No.

"well let's go"

We go out to my car. We get in. I sit there and don't start the car. She says, "what's wrong?"

"you're a liar. You aren't who you said you were"

She doesn't have any more cookies to cling to like a safety blanket. She bursts into tears. Wracking sobs. I just sit there, stunned.

She starts blubbering through her tears. "still me, still me" she's getting louder and louder. "It's still me!! I'm still me!!!"

"Get out of my car."

I drove home. Luckily I didn't drink yet I was only nineteen.

She then spammed my email about how I wanted to date the girl who sent me those emails. And that was actually her. You know those huge guilting I love you, I hate you, I'm sorry, you're such a piece of shit, let's get back together email's you get after you break up? Just like those. I blocked her after a few weeks.

My first catfish

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SerpentCypher · 2019-10-17T01:15:02+00:00

Don't tab shame bro. We can't all be Tab Chad.

SunflowerBurst · 2019-10-17T01:47:30+00:00

Oh you like tabs? Name the highest number of tabs you’ve had open.

QueenCousland86 · 2019-10-17T02:17:20+00:00

Literally all my bad OLD stories happened in the span of four months, because it was such a shitshow, that's how long it took me to give up. My favorites were the unicorn chasers who refused to send me pics of themselves, just the expensive stuff they owned. A black Aston Martin, a black Amex card, the wife's designer purse collection, shit like that.

chaddad9000 · 2019-10-17T03:05:22+00:00

Okay, this was a long time ago, but this woman was just listing off her husband requirements, including how many vacations we'd take and how often I had to buy her flowers, blahblahblah. So I made some crack about looking for someone who really loves sucking dick, and then she said I better love eating pussy too. So I was like hey, let's go back to my place, but she got pissed and left instead.

Only reason I remember this is because we worked together a few years later and she really didn't like me for some reason. And then one day it hit me we had gone on a date. Her husband was a total balding beta type too.

Another date I met this woman at a coffeeshop and within 10 minutes we were discussing fulfilling her rape fantasy. that's probably when I decided OLD was for weirdos and desperates.

HawwYee23 · 2019-10-17T16:49:10+00:00

Bro I want gigabit internet so bad 😩

Title	Best OLD stories
Author	darudeboysandstorm
Upvotes	6
Comments	28
Date	October 17, 2019 1:08 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/diyz9u/best_old_stories/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/best-old-stories.291166 https://theredarchive.com/post/291166

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