"The word "handsome" has several meanings, but as a physical quality, it usually means "having a pleasing and usually impressive or dignified appearance"². The term originates from the Middle English word "handsom", which meant "easy to handle, ready at hand" in the 1400s¹. It later acquired the sense of "fit, appropriate" and then "having fine form, good-looking, agreeable to the eye" in the 1500s and 1600s¹.

Some of the key traits of a handsome man may vary depending on personal preferences and cultural standards, but generally, they include:

  • Symmetry and proportion of facial features
  • Expressive behavior and affectionate disposition
  • Grace of manner and aristocratic bearing
  • Social accomplishments and personal habits
  • Physical fitness and health³

Of course, these are not the only factors that make someone handsome. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, after all. 😉

Source: Conversation with Bing, 10/16/2023 (1) Handsome Definition & Meaning - Merriam-Webster. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/handsome. (2) handsome | Etymology, origin and meaning of handsome by etymonline. https://www.etymonline.com/word/handsome. (3) Physical attractiveness - Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Physical_attractiveness."


This might seem like a bit of a reach but I am convinced that actual charisma, which is rarely developed truly, can outplay raw attraction in a long game. In part the reason being because many women realize quickly, as do men, that attractive people don't necessarily have dignity or ethical evolution, that they are somehow toxic to the soul if they haven't evolved as people.

So in my mind I'm trying to piece together the elements of what "handsomeness" is, in terms of a man who is less traditionally attractive, that is to say lacks facial symmetry, perhaps is physically fit or not. Somewhat lean, or fat, but not outrageously fat for this thought experiment.

Could such a man become "handsome" in a theoretical sense - that is, having a poised and dignified manner, treating those around him with respect and dignity as well, listening to them and caring about people equally, dressing well and taking care of himself so that he does come off as hygienic, not being show boaty or trying to always draw attention to himself, etc.

Could an "ugly" normal looking dude out compete an 8/10 guy in the long run? Could women find him more attractive in a context that isn't Beta Bux related but rather that they genuinely enjoy his company, and such a person would probably be sexually diverse as well and dynamic at creating experiences - can women who are self aware and intelligent, not just materialistic as so many men and women are now in society, truly be enraptured by such a man and in love ? Also important - can women actually have visceral desire for such a man and an ongoing longing? Because this is something that people say no to, but I'm not convinced.

I don't know the answer or what to think. From my perspective as a man I know for a fact I can love such a man but I'm also not physically attracted to men, nor am I a woman, so my perspective is limited.