Branching the discussion from this thread.

There, I claim that most examples of negging used are fairly low-class and admittedly obvious (to drive home a point, rather than to be practical and safe against cautious/aware people IRL).

For the purposes of discussion, "negging" simply means to shake a person's confidence and take her down a notch / off her pedestal.

Check out this ancient article by jezebel (not linked directly) about negging:

http://www.donotlink.com/framed?591656

The author uses a very roundabout way of saying that negging works in general, but that we shouldn't use it. Two of the reasons we shouldn't:

  • Bullying and threats of violence can also get guys what they want. We have to do more than ask "what works," we need to ask "is it worth using?" As tempting as it can be to buy into the myth that "women expect too much" and deserve to be taken down a peg, the reality is that most women don't expect a fusion of Brad Pitt and Deepak Chopra. While there certainly are some women who have grossly unrealistic assumptions about what a relationship with a man can and should provide, men also tend to exaggerate the loftiness of women's expectations. Wanting a guy to be well-groomed and equipped with a basic vocabulary for his own emotional terrain are not unreasonable desires. In most cases, the problem isn't women expecting too much: it's men offering too little.
  • ... what's less authentic than entering into a "spontaneous" social interaction with a script, feigning a mix of candor and lack of interest in the hopes of sparking curiosity and desire? Guys can do better than that.

The second point is rather banal. Scripted interactions are everywhere and part of superficial communication, and I'd rather we not waste time entertaining the Holden Caufields of the world who can't handle it.

The point from the second paragraph is a matter of justification (well, that, and a not-so-subtle passing of the responsibility on to men, "Men, you're offering too little."). It appeals to our morals. If the woman is not being unreasonable, negging is unjustifiable. I'm far more inclined to agree with that on a personal level (that is just preference, I haven't worked out the metaphysics behind it). I don't bother putting down people who haven't slighted me. It certainly works better than his final point.

I believe that most people feel similarly. See this infamous XKCD comic that's fairly popular among feminists and other anti-PUAs. We are meant to cheer when the heroine counter-negs the PUA... because he deserved it. (Tactless bastard!) If someone slights you, social norms allow for a bit of reciprocation without harsh judgment.

The brings into question the level of slights we're talking about that could warrant subtle retaliation.

Hugo, the jezebel author, thinks most slights are minor, inconsequential. Supposedly, most women are not egotistical and do not need to be brought down a notch. He may be right in most cases. It depends on each individuals' level of tolerance.

So let's discuss our thoughts on negging

AND/OR

give examples of negging we've used... or, if you're squeamish about the word, then just examples of "justified retaliation/put downs" like in the case of the XKCD comic, where the chick counter-negged bravely defended herself against the evil PUA.