I'm in a culture where others discuss a person's weight and appearance rather freely. I had to tell my husband that I was not from such a culture and to use some sensitivity.
Well... about a month ago, he looked at me and said, "you've put on some weight." Not with a negative tone, just matter-of-fact. My first reactions were as you'd expect: defensiveness, embarrassment, etc. After stepping on the scale later that evening I found he was right--my BMI had gone up to 20 instead of my usual 19, a difference of about 7-10 pounds. While it sucked to hear I then got my butt into gear and I've lost 7 lbs.
It's taboo for men to comment on their SO's weight, but I wonder if it should be. I think it's a fair expectation to remain within the same weight parameters, exceptions being medical circumstances and of course pregnancy/a window post-pregnancy. Maybe it's on par with expecting our husbands to earn just as much as when we first met them? I don't know. If that's the equivalency then a man commenting on weight would be like women commenting on a man's paycheck that it's less than usual.
In hindsight, though, I'm actually thankful my husband said something. I didn't notice I had gained weight because I think it was so gradual (plus I hate stepping on scales). But it did take a ton of pride swallowing, and it made me wonder: Is weight ever a topic of conversation in anyone else's relationship? Or is the topic off-limits? Has your weight stayed the same or has it fluctuated?
Also, how do y'all manage weight loss? Sometimes I go straight up raw vegan, but this time I counted calories. It sucked. Subsisting on 1200 calories is doable but not fun. Nonetheless it definitely revealed that even though I eat healthy/clean, it's still possible to overeat. I'm happy with where I am now, but I'm in that annoying phase of having to transition out of calorie counting while not reverting back to old portion sizes.
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