Any feminine behaviour learning help?

sidus_3 · 2016-04-25T05:23:54+00:00

In college, I was stuffing envelopes with some friends for some club. One of the girls who was in a sorority told me that her friend taught her that cards should always be inserted into the envelope in a very specific way. After discovering that this was learned in a finishing school in Texas, I became mildly obsessed with learning the things I didn't even realize I didn't know about proper behavior.

I found websites for foreign finishing schools (a surprising number in India) and found an old book detailing the educational content of finishing school 40ish years ago. Then I took the curriculum and used it as a list of things to search and learn. Some things were unlearnable in the United States in the early 2000's (fairly explicit sexual things taught in Russian finishing schools).

The quality of finishing school sites is generally low and foreign finishing schools tend to have dated recommendations for fashion/makeup. However it made for an interesting jumping off point.

In high school, my mother sent me to a modeling class which was actually a basic manners and makeup course. So once a week I would go with two of my friends from school and we would practice sitting with our ankles crossed to one side or getting out of a car gracefully over and over or walking without swaying our hips while our feet landed on a single line. I like knowing how to do those things even if most of the time I get out of my car like a baboon and overall it was an enjoyable experience which helped me ultimately feel at ease in almost any setting.

You can google finishing schools as easily as I can. Here's two sites that came up for me:

here and an article here - just an article

Books:

Better than Beauty - an old book that has been re-released
Old Girl Scouts books from used book stores or thrift stores (the etiquette sections are excellent as are the instructions on packing a suitcase like a lady)

Other random sites:

Thirtysomethink · 2016-04-25T08:32:35+00:00

I can recommend reading The Satanic Witch by Anton Szandor LaVey. First published in 1970, it is a guide on how to use your feminine wiles to wield power over men, i.e. how to become so attractive that men will desire you and want to do things for you (including, but definitely not limited to, committing to you and providing for you).

It's not a perfect book because it's got some excruciatingly silly stuff in it (for instance, I wouldn't recommend actually wearing your menstrual blood in a pouch around your neck), so you have to exercise a healthy skepticism while reading it. But it's nothing short of excellent for driving home the importance of your looks and your feminine demeanor to a smart young girl who is struggling to wrap her mind around it, and it's got TONS of detailed, practicable advice on how to look feminine and be feminine (which is what you're seeking).

It blew my mind when I first read it at age 17 and definitely changed my life for the better, particularly because there was just no going back to repressing my femininity after reading this section (bolding is mine):

Learn to Be Stupid

It has been said that a donkey should never be sent to college, because nobody likes a smart ass. Very few men like a woman who asserts her intelligence, and the truly smart witch will demonstrate how intelligent she is rather than pay lip service to her mental prowess through the use of an awesome vocabulary. Of course nothing turns a man off more than an utterly stupid woman, except one whose speech is laced with highly technical, analytical and clinical expressions where they are not needed.

Countless comedy characterizations have been based on the pseudo-intellectual woman, yet there are plenty of them in our midst. With these types, words become a substitute for sex appeal, for these women hate the fact they were born as woman and want to be accepted on a basis other than femininity. There is nothing wrong with this, so long as there is no desire to practice applied witchery, as sex, sentiment or wonder must accompany such a pursuit.

Intellectualism for its own sake seldom has any place in the behavior pattern of the witch, unless one can cleverly combine it with sex and wonder themes. This would produce a glamorous lady mad-doctor, wearing a skimpy laboratory frock and working amidst the surroundings of Frankenstein's workshop. Such a woman would be expected to be highly articulate, as it would be consistent with her image. Undoubtedly, she would find many men that would gladly submit to her "experiments". It should be obvious that in such a case, even pseudo-intellectualism is in order, as it is all part of the game.

If you find yourself inclined towards placing verbosity above your physical attributes, you must learn how to act stupid, especially if your physical attributes are lavish. When I say stupid, I mean stupid! Overcompensation is the only means that can be employed to artificially bring an overbalanced situation back to a central balance point. This is one law that applies in all phases of magic. If you are a nut on using big words, you'll have to force yourself to check your speech. Don't worry that you'll make a fool of yourself, even if throw in a few genuinely ignorant comments. If all else fails, you might try gum-chewing. It's pretty hard to be an intellectual with a mouth full of gum.

The girl who is in trouble is the one who is not very bright in the first place and tries to play the cute-but-dumb seductress. She is simply making the worst of an already bad situation! The girl who is really intelligent can always afford to act less so; but the girl who tries to act and talk in an intellectual manner but who lacks common sense will always fail. Any dumb belle can learn a mouthful of big words, yet be at a loss when it comes to thinking anything out for herself. Such people are educated morons, and if they could be shrunk down and feathers glued on them, would out-sell parrots, hands down.

Men do appreciate women with brains, but don't ever kid yourself for one minute that you can use a totally intellectual approach as a magical weapon when bewitching a man. His first thoughts will always be based on your appearance. Once you have bedazzled him, you may allow him to realize you are intelligent as well. Then he will think he hit the jackpot when he met you.

Intelligence is always of secondary importance in enchanting men, although it should eventually be apparent to any man who is himself intelligent. No girl likes to be thought of as stupid, yet there is a vast difference between real stupidity and sensible restraint from the use of overbearing and high-flown pseudo-intellectualism. If such tasteful restraint from unnecessarily technical and scholarly verbosity is what you would consider stupidity, then you'd best study stupidity and learn it well!

I've spent my adult life practicing what LaVey preaches here and can vouch for the results. And keep in mind I was one of those girls who was well on my way to becoming an antisocial and shriveled-up woman in STEM research competing like a man for intellectual validation only! I was not naturally feminine by any means (nor was my mother or any other role model in my life). But reading The Satanic Witch was like being vaccinated against ever again forgetting that I was a woman, and forcing myself to figure out how to be feminine has paid off thousandfold.

QueenBee126 · 2016-04-25T02:13:35+00:00

I second this; any book recommendations ladies?

4delicioustreats · 2016-04-25T04:23:38+00:00

I don't know of guides of the media you mentioned, but elderly Christian women can be great role models.

wanderingdorathy · 2016-04-25T04:23:43+00:00

I would love this. I was raised by my dad and only have older brothers. I'm in college and testing out dating, but a lot of my intuitive mannerisms are fairly masculine and I've been told I can be intimidating because of it. I'd love some pointers that aren't compilations created by Cosmo.

code5fun · 2016-04-27T10:10:11+00:00

I will give you a quick gem right here:

Make him feel stronger than you. Like being unable to open a can and let him do it. Or being unable to carry the groceries and comment him for his strength while he is doing it. Even if it's acted and he knows it is, it will be such a turn on for the man. We are still animals and we are hardwired to our stone age selves and pushing up his confidence will make him love you more and in return his confidence will make you attracted to him more. It is a cycle which only leads to more love.

queenofquac · 2016-05-16T03:51:08+00:00

I am a reader so I did a lot of my learning with books! My mom was not feminine at all, and I realized late in the game all the info I was missing. I freaked out one summer after being snubbed for my friend's super swanky wedding (oh GOD - I'm A MONSTER!) and read maybe 15 books about fashion, etiquette, and being feminine. Here is my run down.

Emily Post is the classic etiquette guide - and my go to wedding gift. Its HUGE but there are great chapters on thank you notes, table manners, greetings, etc. Super classy guide to life. I also read a few books about french fashion and manners - Lessons from Mme Chic. The author is very feminine and I subscribe to her youtube channel the daily connoisseur. Kate Spade has a few cute guide books about these things too. They were ok - nothing to write home about though. One of my favorite books about male/ female relations is For Women Only. Seriously helped me realize when I could be softer and gentler - and what men really crave to feel fulfilled. After reading it, I feel like I finally understand what men desire out of interactions, even non flirtatious ones.

Also I'm involved in church and I have found so many great women to look up to. My rough edges have softened - but I still am putting my principles into practice. Good luck friend! You can do it!

ReclaimingFeminity · 2016-04-26T14:14:00+00:00

A while back I asked about the book Man Leads by Ro Elori Cutno. It wasn't well received; there's a well known page that tells women that they need to "respect all men, at all times" and while I personally felt that that namely applies to the men who are in your life every day, other members at the time interpreted it very differently. Of course, I mean no ill will towards anyone, but I digress. My main question is, has anyone read this book, and if so, do you feel that it would help OP with developing feminine behavior?

plein_old · 2016-04-26T21:22:57+00:00

Whoa, you might want to be careful about satanic advice - unless you're sure that's what you want. Referring to the Anton LaVey thing another commenter mentioned.

Part of the key to feminine & classy behavior, in my opinion, is learning to be gentle and non-aggressive. For instance, if there's something someone is doing that you don't like, there can be gentle ways to deal with it. A crass person shouts and makes jerky motions and so on - there's no harmony or beauty in how they move or talk. You could learn an art form - like flower arranging or music or who knows what - to help practice some of these principles. I could also suggest another resource if this sounds good so far.

Title	Any feminine behaviour learning help?
Author	wifeintrainz
Upvotes	24
Comments	38
Date	April 25, 2016 1:39 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/4gb54n/any_feminine_behaviour_learning_help/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/any-feminine-behaviour-learning-help.86142 https://theredarchive.com/post/86142

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