Subtle red flags for men?

Scared-Tea-8911 · 2023-07-28T02:36:21+00:00

I’m not sure most “lists” are really valid. I understand the desire to boil down human attraction into a simple “dos and don’ts” list, but for every item you can list you will find a successful counterpoint.

Additionally, changing yourself or masking your natural self is a recipe for disaster - while we all want to put our best foot forward in dating, being deceptive or purposely hiding something from your partner is not going to end well in the medium/long term.

At the end of the day, it’s not about appealing to every man - it’s about appealing to the right man. In the examples you gave… some women would find a guy who texts back and texts often to be reassuring and endearing, but you didn’t like it. Likewise, men will find some trait that many may enjoy, and just happen to personally dislike it.

If you want to improve yourself (not just mask a behavior), that is another type of project! Working to cultivate feminine traits, and to be a mentally and physically healthy person is an excellent goal, and will keep you off most mens “red flag lists”.

iLiveInAHologram94 · 2023-07-28T04:09:19+00:00

One of mine was calling me babe, baby, sweetie etc. too early. Comes off as forced intimacy and is trying to move things emotionally along faster than they should. Makes me think he’s saying one thing and means another. It’s a subtle red flag.

timcogyr · 2023-07-28T05:27:22+00:00

Someone who doesn’t recognize or care about the influence they have on others. Examples could be speaking negatively about someone who is generally kind and friendly or someone who doesn’t take time or effort to acknowledge others in their space. As if to act like others are beneath them or that they don’t care enough. It’s the nonchalant idgaf approach to life that show’s immaturity and low EQ.

ArkNemesis00 · 2023-07-28T04:46:20+00:00

No one word answers. Spend effort into keeping the conversation afloat. If your responses are consistently significantly shorter than his and you ask questions way less, this can come across as disinterested.

Take negative statements (Don't message me if you're __) and rephrase them as positive (I'm looking for __).

Avoid statements that lump together or assume the intent of people you disagree with (she did this to me because she's ____).

Try to avoid completely offloading responsibility about things that have gone wrong in your life (my last boyfriend and I broke up because he couldn't ____).

Make sure he gets your full attention when discussing something important to him and that you're not simply "waiting for your turn to talk". Listen and ask questions about his day.

As you're somebody with long-term goals, make sure you don't only talk about short-term gratification (I'm so excited to get off work and chill on Friday). Delayed gratification is often less fun to talk about, but you want to accurately display what you're looking for and who you are.

ArdentBandicoot · 2023-07-28T10:01:20+00:00

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ArdentBandicoot · 2023-07-28T10:52:51+00:00

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BecomingABetterMan1 · 2023-07-28T01:57:04+00:00

There are many, many books and videos on this subject. Almost the entire Red Pill sphere is spouting something about it.

First thing that comes to mind is Rich Cooper's list, which most men agree with. Obviously there will be outliers who will disagree and other add-ins.

A note: most of the red flags are actions, not words. Although, words can absolutely give away past/present actions and behaviors.

AutoModerator · 2023-07-28T01:47:51+00:00

Title: Subtle red flags for men?

Full text: For me as a woman dating right now, there are little behaviors or quirks I see that make me discontinue the conversation or not even start it. For example, if somebody has "no drama" in their bio or too many emojis (just seems immature). I will sometimes stop talking if they text me too many times too quickly, or their topics of conversation have a consistent theme of judgementalism. Things like that. What's men's version of this list? There are some men I'm interested in that haven't lost interest, but I'm afraid might if I accidentally say something that would register as a red flag, and I want to be aware of what impact my actions and words have.

What are some things high value men avoid in a woman, either first impressions or mid-talking? What's their subtle red flag list?

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abu_nawas · 2023-07-29T06:01:49+00:00

Things I've done that offended high-value men:

Promiscuity. Talking about exes or seeing other people.
Bad taste. Like, hair color that's too light or too dark than your natural color. Bad wardrobe. Not knowing how to carry yourself in a civilized establishment. Yes, I know not all of us went to finishing school, but be HUMBLE about it. Don't put on airs and pretend to be somebody you're not.
Lack of ambition. Even if he's looking for a stay-at-home partner, make sure you're doing something with your life.

Rushing things is a 50/50. Some high-value men take things very seriously, and may reward your boldness.

Title	Subtle red flags for men?
Author	Adorable-Bee-850
Upvotes	9
Comments	16
Date	July 28, 2023 1:47 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/15bk2bf/subtle_red_flags_for_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/subtle-red-flags-for-men.1226697 https://theredarchive.com/post/1226697

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