Why do we want commitment?

anna27000 · 2021-06-13T17:45:48+00:00

Women generally want commitment because they want a father for their children. They do not want to be single moms. They want consistent physical and emotional support.

Women have a limited number of eggs, whereas men do not have a limited number of sperm. Also giving birth is a ordeal that men don't have to do. So women are more invested in raising children in the most ideal environment, and men are more invested in finding mating opportunities. Its hard to explain, look up "anisogamy".

Because of this biology, women and men have evolved to have different desires. However this is all generalizing. Some women are more interested in sex, and some men are more interested in commitment. So we all need to figure out what is best for ourselves.

AnotherRichard827379 · 2021-06-13T19:35:52+00:00

Just putting it out there that men also want commitment.

KombuchaEnema · 2021-06-13T18:17:18+00:00

From a biological standpoint, women (who want children) need the father of the child to protect and provide. It’s hard to hunt and protect yourself and your child when you’re pregnant and/or breastfeeding. Women have a biological imperative to make sure our children have strong fathers.

Even today, single motherhood is terrible for kids. I’m not going to even cite sources because at this point it’s common knowledge that single motherhood is not good for kids.

Nowadays people are obsessed with the concept of “love” and “soul mates.” To many young people love is some weird combination of friendship and sexual attraction. That’s why so many people break up when they stop feeling butterflies every time they’re around each other. They break up when the tingles go away.

From a traditional standpoint “love” is based more on compatibility and partnership. Do my knees go weak every time I see my husband? No. Am I sometimes annoyed by his general existence when we aren’t getting along? Yes. But at the end of the day, he’s my go-to person. He’s my partner. We have built a life together. We have pair-bonded. We work well together, even when we have our dumb little arguments about him tracking mud through the kitchen that I just mopped.

If you view love as “I love him so much and have no problems with him and I’m always so turned on by him” then of course you can’t promise to love someone forever.

But if you view love as “I care about him and we make a good team and he is my mate even when I’m angry at him or when sexual attraction isn’t at an all-time high” then you can absolutely make that promise to love someone forever.

Love isn’t just about touchy-feely stuff. It’s about knowing that your partner is the one for you and sticking through things even when it gets dull or bothersome (obviously if you’re being abused or things are truly unfixable, you leave). Partnerships aren’t always exciting. Partnerships aren’t always butterflies in your stomach and perfect communication and awesome sex.

The hard truth is that marriage isn’t always about “love” in the way we view it. It’s about partnership. It’s about compatibility. It’s about staying with someone who is a stable, reliable person for you even when the honeymoon phase ends and things start to feel predictable.

HappilyMrs · 2021-06-13T19:34:01+00:00

Protection, financial provision, security, companionship, having an anchor.

pearlsandstilettos · 2021-06-13T17:57:32+00:00

Is there a resource out there explaining why women want commitment/marriage

You will find that much of RP is "we have experienced this to be true" rather than "Dr. Red studied this in a lab and found ..."

Women tend to want commitment and I'd argue that the reasons that we will give are post hoc rationalization. Why does the 'why' matter?

If you don't believe in a lifetime relationship, then don't get married. Nothing in RPW requires this step. Nothing in 2021 requires that you be part of a couple. Figure out your goals and work towards them.

I will say that I was taught that marriage is something you work for. It's a choice that you keep making. You may not like or love your partner every day for the rest of your life. Sometimes he will drive you insane. But overall you pick someone that you want in your life forever and you do the best you can to make things work. It's not like you get married and that's the finish line.

pubgmisc · 2021-06-19T06:10:22+00:00

Just to add: If women were ostracized by society in the past, they wouldn't survive. That's why you're also more socially calibrated and agreeable than men

Title	Why do we want commitment?
Author	throway4444444
Upvotes	6
Comments	10
Date	June 13, 2021 5:08 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/nz0y4n/why_do_we_want_commitment/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/why-do-we-want-commitment.782539 https://theredarchive.com/post/782539

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