Summary: Your body is a perfect topic for "Attraction Basics" series which is all about things to be fixed before anyone should hit the streets (or bars, or clubs if you're into that).

Today's topic has been around forever and of course I'm just another guy writing about this. My experience is threefold: I'm a daygamer (approaching new girls almost every day and testing various theories), marathon runner (last marathon run in 3 hours 4 minutes) and - recently - a lifter (this month I finally managed to bench press 100 kg for more than 1 rep; I weight 76 kg). I'm not the best in any of those but I can't say I'm bad at any. Obligatory shirtless pics: 1, 2 - these are from January 2016.

 

Women are attracted to nice bodies. By neglecting that part of your SMV you're just lowering your chances of getting hot girls. At the very least you should be fit. If you want your appearance to work in your favor - aim for being jacked. And of course being skinny isn't as bad as being fat but it's still not a good look.

There are tons of places where you can get good advice on how to lose fat and build muscles. Remember that for a beginner doing anything is better than doing nothing. Any physical activity will work in your favor. But once you've lost excess fat you have to train smart. Or better yet - start working out properly from the very beginning.

 

1) Diet

There is no good body without good diet. Everyone who say otherwise is a liar. And there are far too many contradicting articles on that topic. But we all can agree that if you eat less calories than you burn - you'll be leaner. If you eat more - you'll bulk. If you won't provide enough proteins whatever you gain will be mostly fat. So the key message is: don't eat more than your body uses and provide enough proteins.

For a guy that doesn't want to be a bodybuilder there are just three things to remember: 1. Let go of as many bad carbohydrates as you can (white bread, buns, sodas, anything considered sweets, deserts, juices, etc.; if it's high in sugar - don't eat/drink it!) 2. Eat as much unprocessed food as you can (especially meat and other protein sources) 3. Don't eat highly processed shit (fast food, snacks) - if you can, cook for yourself; if you really need a snack - eat nuts, fish, cheese or even a protein bar. Don't snack on carbohydrates!

When you do all three you'll find it's easy to eat around 2000-2500 kcal per day and very very hard to go over 3500 (if for whatever reason you'd want to). Things that are low in carbs and high in protein/fat are rarely unhealthy and usually satiating. Meaning you won't crave snacks between your meals. And no, fat isn't going to make you fat. That's what carbs do.

 

2) Low intensity training

You want to be lean without having to do heavy work? Who wouldn't? But unfortunately it's not how the body works. I've rewritten this section at least three times as originally this post was created months ago. Since then I've prepared workout plans for few friends and learned that low intensity training isn't the way to go. Why? Results are coming way too slow for most guys to stick to this approach.

I did got lean and even gained some muscle doing mostly endurance work - lots of reps with light to moderate weight, bodyweight exercises like pus-ups, crunches, squats, scissors, etc. It took me years to get "great" physique. Which as soon as I stared to lift heavy turned out to be "decent" at best. It's healthy but far from effective.

Running is whole different story - you shouldn't be doing long distance runs at all. I know what I'm saying. I'm running marathons and only good it does for me is in giving me free pass to eat literally anything on weekends as it's the time for my long runs (25-35 km). Other than that - it takes a lot of time, makes you really tired and also contributes to muscle loss.

Yes, running burns tons of calories. But if you're overweight it's very hard to run significant distance with decent tempo. If you're skinny it hampers any muscle gains. The only way to combine working out and running - if you're as stupid as me - is to work out a lot, run a lot and eat tons of food that provide you with all the necessary proteins. It's extremely demanding and even though I'm living like that for past two years I don't know anyone who does that too. Which probably means it's not a good idea.

 

3) High intensity training

That's the "easy" way - lifting. Gym, sweat, heavy weights, pain, stuff like that. And because it's so fast it's the default strategy for most of the guys. It's not only fast - bigger muscles means body needs more energy just to maintain them. You won't be burning much calories during your training sessions but in the long term it will be so much easier to stay lean given the muscle buildup and boosted metabolism. Sounds cool but how to begin?

I can give you probably the best advice that there is (besides hiring a trainer or consulting a lifting friend): make yourself a training program. It's not going to be perfect or optimal. It will, however, work. If you're just starting then whatever you do will work. Body will respond really quickly and in time, as you get more friends at the gym, they'll show you better ways. Or you can start reading something like T-Nation.

If you want to do it all by yourself then at first decide how often you can train. I started by training 40-50 minutes every workday morning. Some start by doing heavy lifts 3 times a week (that takes about hour and a half). Both are good starting points. As your body changes you'll want more and probably go somewhere near 5-6 sessions per week. That's great but don't rush there. Make your schedule realistic.

If you're just starting train your whole body every session. You need to go through the DOMS (delayed onset muscle soreness) stage and just get used to training. You can even start with two workouts per week, then go to three as soon as you're no longer sore. After few months during which you hopefully will make friends at the gym you can work with them to create a split (training different body parts on different days). But that's a whole other text.

Go with the most basic exercises. For example for chest pick bench press, incline bench press, flyes; for triceps - French press, kickbacks, skull crushers... At first avoid machines - go free weights (barbell, dumbbell). In Poland the standard site to use that lists all the basic exercises by muscle group is this: http://www.kulturystyka.pl/atlas/ and I'm sure you can find something similar in English.

Learn how to train by yourself. Ask others about proper execution of the exercises but being your own trainer will help you in the long run. Every body is different and you should learn how to listen to yours. I'm doing different exercises with different weight and rep/set schemes than my gym-buddy. We both progress because we both know what's best for us. I wouldn't have those gains using his program and he wouldn't have his using mine. Of course there are general guidelines but only you feel your body and see what's working for you.

 

4) Results - body & mind

The hardest thing is to start. Wake up, start the training. Go out and run first few meters. Pick up the first weight. Day after day. But you know what? After months of doing this something changes inside of you. Not only you start to like working out because you can see your body changes. You also learn how to be dedicated and relentless. Just like easier interactions with other people are a side effect of daygame, being tenacious is byproduct of training consistently.

I've talked to many people that somehow cannot imagine training at home. They need to go to the gym and train there. Everything is easier when there are other people around you. If you take a shot on doing something alone then you know you're doing it for yourself and battling your own hamster. If you win there's so much more to gain. But as in daygame - everything's easier with a wing.

Heavy lifting supposedly promotes testosterone production. I'm no expert but it definitely makes you feel better. When you look in the mirror and think "I look good" the next thought that pops up is "how can I make myself even better?". Yes, it's an never-ending story but every step of it is exciting. Just like daygame.

So - get yourself a gym membership, find a workout friend or just go and pick up some damn weights. You won't regret it.

 

Lessons learned:

  • Lift, obviously.
  • You don't need a mentor, learn how to learn by yourself.
  • Don't run. I'm doing it and it's not a smart idea.
  • Fix your diet and your workouts simultaneously for the results to be even faster.
  • Don't try to do the advanced stuff in the beginning. Stick to basics.

 

You can find other posts from "Attraction Basics" through my post history or on my daygame blog where I post other daygame-related texts (some of which are pure mental masturbation).