So it's been a long semester. I finished my last final as an undergraduate student and it was my first time going out on the town since losing 40 pounds. I never talked to anyone at school until this past year and now as I move onto dental school I am admittedly upset on missing out on these experiences. I definitely am happy I had the experience I had tonight so I can focus on the future and not the past.

I am not super muscular, but I am not all flab and have great style. For the first time in my life I don't feel self conscious about my weight or appearance and it is an amazing feeling. After a long day of drinking we hit a smaller club and for the first time in my life, a girl came up to ME and told me that her friend wants to dance with me. This was huge as I have not gone out since my huge weight loss and on my FIRST DAY out this happens. I ended up talking with the group of three girls who were a HB4, HB5, and HB7 for a while. Although not anything special, I decided why not chat them up and at least have some fun. I didn't really isolate any of the girls but I was talking to the HB7 for a while. Unfortunately I didn't get her number since they all decided to "go to the bathroom" at the same time. I said fuck it in my mind and went back to my friends and chilled for a bit more. No big deal, I talked to girls and this was a big accomplishment for me.

Shortly after I wanted to chat up another group of girls, this time by myself without their encouragement. I spotted a group consisting of an HB6 and HB7 with one fatty in the mix. Lo and behold, all it took was me walking up and saying "Hey guys how is everyone doing tonight". They loved it. I didn't die, I didn't get made fun of, and I didn't get laughed at by my friends who surely were watching. I genuinely had a great time tonight. I never have done things like this before, and as I type this I am still a bit shaky from the "rush" of these new feelings; The euphoria of it. For the first time in my life I felt like there was no pressure on me to get these girls to like me. All I sought out to do tonight was to share my positivity with other people in the club as me. Did I invest my time too much in too little amounts of people? Maybe. Did I get any numbers, kiss, or F close? No. Did I have fun and accomplish my goals? Yes. That is what matters. I cannot wait for the next time I am out and give it another go, knowing that rejection or acceptance from whatever people I chat up, I will live to tell the tale. My diet ended this past week, and the gym will be starting right back up on Monday morning. I am going to fix all the mistakes I made in the past, so that I can live in happiness for the future.