Half un-plugged (but only when single), how to maintain

dr_warlock · 2015-07-07T05:47:08+00:00

LTR's are deceptive to a man. They seem like a destination. You think you found a girl who will accept your true nature and fall into complacency, expecting her to always be there. She is not your blood, her hypergamy is always looking to trade up. You do not get to stop doing what got her in the first place. An ltr is not a destination.

For an LTR to be successful, sexual desire must be present because all romantic relationships are time, energy, resources, and commitment in exchange for sex. If a man no longer has desire for his woman, he doesn't provide the resources and commitment. If a woman loses desire, she will stop offering sex and sparingly give it out just enough to keep her provisioning while looking to branch swing (duty sex), maybe not even that.

The thing about human desire is that it doesn't last for long after the initial spark of attraction (honey moon phase). After that it requires artificial acts to sustain it, especially for a woman. For her, you have to consistently induce feelings on every part of the spectrum to keep her interested. LTR's by their very nature make you very familiar each other. Eventually you've had sex in every position in every location. Fucking the same person for long gets old. Comfort sets in which breeds contempt because satisfaction is the death of desire. Strict monogamy is not natural in humans. This idea only arrised after agriculture when major religions came about. There's a reason a lot of brainwashing, fear, and shame was and to some extent is still used today to ensure fidelity in strict monogamy, because it isn't natural. Only men would believe such concepts of everlasting love, women never have. ~"Men are the romantics trying to be realistic, women are realistic trying to be romantics" - /u/Rollo-Tomassi, The True Romantics

LTR's outside the honeymoon phase have no purpose other than having children, that's why religion enforced it to the extreme. Humans used to live in tribes, the village raised the children. Only the mothers were certain of paternity, and everyone was of the same race so the child looked similar to every man. This uncertainty and everyone being of the same race gave every man motivation to investing care for the child because it just might be theirs. There wasn't such a concept of property or the family unit. Those concepts only arose after agriculture when people wanted to know how to divide 'their land' and 'property' among their relatives. The family unit is what keeps civilization, an artificial, unnatural creation stable and growing because an artificial system requires an artificial maintenance method. The ruling class of these civilizations (originally 'city states') needed men of all smv's to contribute to the labor force, which requires surplus. How do you motivate him to create surplus? Restrict all sexual outlets to one passage, marriage, legal obligatory provisioning for a creature who is ever hypergamous and the children who result for a lifetime and punish all yee who dare attempt to break this union. 'Cheating' used to be sex outside the tribe, but now the 'tribe' is the family unit. Sex outside the binary unit is the new cheating.

If the family unit is not natural, why do women crave marriage and LTRs? As I said earlier, the village used to be the family. All surplus was distributed among everyone in the tribe. When a woman was no longer sexually viable or wanted, she still had a place of comfort. The system provided for her and she provided for the system by doing the womans duties and helping the next generation of younger women and children. After agriculture, it was every family unit for themselves. Any women and children not being provided for my a particular man requires forced taxation aka redistribution of wealth to sustain.

To get back to your question, you have to stop believing in the narrative set by the media, thus by extention, the ruling class (all major media outlets are owned by multinational multi billion dollar corporations like General Electric). You were never meant to be in strict monogamy. There is no such thing as unconditional love and men and women don't 'love' the same. You can never get complacent or show signs of weakness, that is the luxury of the woman, and the burden of the man. This was an ideology instilled in the populace to keep men as work horses for the economy and to sell more product. Once you erase this ideology from your mind, you will be much more successful with women and enjoy life to a greater extent. The only thing you can do to optimize the length of a successful relationship of a woman is continue to be what got her, keep your game sharp, trust she will act like a woman, and always have potential options should it fail. That's all you can do. If she wants to cheat, if she wants to leave, she can and will without remorse.

Note: excuse spelling, I wrote this on my phone.

AureliusThunderkok · 2015-07-07T05:48:28+00:00

< Ehh, well, as much as a lot of guys here want to say AWALT, it is more like "AWALT that are susceptible to TRP." This is a point of contention, but the preponderance of poor success in this area (as evidenced in posts) shows that the well-rounded woman is going to have too much self respect to go for TRP principles when it comes to relationships. You could go the easy route and say that that's just because all women are whores, or you could actually go golden rule and find someone who is going to be a partner, not a constant worry. This will be downvoted to hell, because a lot of guys here think it doesn't exist, but treating women like shit is a good way to ensure they're going to cheat on you. Don't lose yourself, don't cater to their every whim, but also date with a mind to the kind of woman you'd want your kids to share genetic material with. Do you really want the gullible woman who falls for "dread game"?

This is my experience also. For some who are lost in a low-level game a quality woman may indeed seem like a unicorn. Alternatively it may be the social setting (i.e. college) that drives that perception. Regardless, if you get outside of that and see more of the world you will see that good women (and men) still exist. They may not be as common as they once were but they are neither rare or extinct .

For you: putting all of your focus on her in a relationship creates pressure as well as the impression that you are weak or a "clinger." Maintain independence in your activities, manage your expectations for each other (do not give her a free pass on everything ; do not give in on every argument - "push and pull") and keep your smv up by attention to fitness, diet, lifestyle, grooming/fashion, etc. Pull your weight in the bedroom too.

jeanclaudevanman · 2015-07-07T13:38:21+00:00

But I loved to pamper my GFs, I love to cook, I love to go out of my way to show how much I loved them, etc, etc... all for what?

First order of business: Ask yourself why you like to do this? You are deriving internal pleasure from an external source you cannot control. This is fine and dandy until that external source goes away. When you do things from the inside out, you are in full control of your emotions and life.

I want a family, I want a wife and 2-3 kids and that whole shindig. I do not want to be some 40-something player who has a different girlfriend every year and 'lives it up' on my salary, just not for me.

Second order of business: Stop putting the cart before the horse. You're letting your future desires get in the way of your present life. This is altering your present behavior which is consciously and subconsciously affecting your relationships.

I would suggest you don't date at all, but plate. After you have a few spinning, you will realize an abundance mentality is all you need to overcome your present situation.

pheluhnee · 2015-07-07T14:12:49+00:00

[deleted]

What is this?

stolidfact · 2015-07-07T14:54:04+00:00

You need to surrender your goal of wife and kids to a greater growth opportunity. Examine why you want that and what it means for your life (likely some version of legacy). Understand how all of you is your legacy. And how family and a supporting spouse adds to the legacy.

Embrace the pain and growth. It's a hell of an awesome ride. That's the endgame. Not a 40-something player, not that there's anything wrong with that.

That said, if you do want kids and a family to be part of your legacy, then of course pursue that.

Women don't want perfect. See through the test. Perfect is boring and milquetoast. Don't be that guy.

redpillspeeddate · 2015-07-07T17:14:48+00:00

Yes, you need to be dating younger girls. I'm a bit older but I have found 4-8 years younger to be the sweet spot.
It sounds like in your LTR you gave up on leading and being fun. If you do this with any high value girl she is going to walk. Realize that women actually hate to lead and would much rather follow. If you stop making 98% of the decisions then she will slowly hate you and lose respect for you. Yes it is hard work but you are the captain, stop making her choose. The sentence that my LTR hears the most from me is "You'll see" that way even if you don't have a plan, it seems like you do and you will have time to make one. Girls like surprises and mystery, if she doesn't know where she is going, she can't say no.

Assassin1476 · 2015-07-07T19:43:26+00:00

Any woman that you think about making your gf or LTR; before the fairy dust sets in your eyes and blinds you to the truth, make a list of every possible fault or red flag this potential chick has. What you're putting up with now, what you won't put up with. Put all the (temporary) pros and every single red flag and con on that list and email it to yourself, keep it under your pillow or put it somewhere where can access this list at any point in time. Write yourself a small paragraph or so about this chick, how you feel about her and what you think of her and some sort of ending message/warning like "Don't fall into the Matrix; you wrote this when you were single and seeing everything clearly as a red pill. You may not see everything the same when you pull this out again in the future, but if she has gotten worse than this list, you feel different about her, there is more BS than there use to be, save yourself and get rid of this hoe."

Use this as a life line man. You're slightly red pill now and this chick may possibly seem like wifey material during the present but that can alllllll change down the road; whether it's weeks, months or even years. This is a good way to save yourself because you might not take advice from this forum or other people you know down the road but you will always be more likely to listen to yourself and the best time to listen to yourself is when you're thinking the most clearly.

waldener · 2015-07-07T04:04:37+00:00

Summary: When I'm single I revert to the alpha that leads me to sleeping with/dating interesting/hot girls, but once I find a girl to LTR with I slowly convert to beta and it fizzles out and dies... How do I stop this!?

Know what you want, and don't settle for anything less.

If you're sizzling out in a LTR it is because you aren't secure enough in your own identity and are letting your identity as part of a couple consume you. You need to have your own hobbies and goals, stuff that you do and make. Women like this because it is a lot more attractive than men who are taking them shopping and carrying their purse.

But with TRP stuff, how do you find a girl worth actually locking up (that isn't the aforementioned 'whore')???

Ehh, well, as much as a lot of guys here want to say AWALT, it is more like "AWALT that are susceptible to TRP." This is a point of contention, but the preponderance of poor success in this area (as evidenced in posts) shows that the well-rounded woman is going to have too much self respect to go for TRP principles when it comes to relationships. You could go the easy route and say that that's just because all women are whores, or you could actually go golden rule and find someone who is going to be a partner, not a constant worry. This will be downvoted to hell, because a lot of guys here think it doesn't exist, but treating women like shit is a good way to ensure they're going to cheat on you. Don't lose yourself, don't cater to their every whim, but also date with a mind to the kind of woman you'd want your kids to share genetic material with. Do you really want the gullible woman who falls for "dread game"?

oldredder · 2015-07-08T03:24:20+00:00

but once I find a girl to LTR with I slowly convert to beta and it fizzles out and dies... How do I stop this!?

You don't. As a real beta you are programmed this way. A real alpha has nothing to slide into - he is always the same.

Follow up: Do I need to be dating younger girls now (24-26) in hopes of finding girls a) before their wall and b) to find a future wife...

ABSOLUTELY.

I only once dated a woman over 30. I was under 30 at the time. Now I'm almost 40. I'll go with 18-25 from now on and for sex - I stopped dating. I want sex, not feelz.

Title	Half un-plugged (but only when single), how to maintain
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	16
Comments	32
Date	July 7, 2015 3:40 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3cdvkx/half_unplugged_but_only_when_single_how_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/half-un-plugged-but-only-when-single-how-to.34419 https://theredarchive.com/post/34419

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