So I'd like to go over something that I read in a previous post on here that I think was very important but wasn't understood by a lot of guys here (as evidenced by the hamstering in the comments). Here is my way of explaining it.

She's out of my league

When you meet a pretty girl, or are mustering up the courage to cold-approach one, you may hamster yourself into paralysis by thinking of yourself as too ugly for her standards. You may think "a girl like that would never go for a guy like me". This will cause you to pussy out, or only approach ugly girls that you think you are in the league in.

Even if you do manage to snap yourself out and talk to her, you may be super nervous and edgy because you have still pedestalised her into someone so attractive that she is bothered by your presence.

STOP

It is not your job to determine whether you are in her league or not

I'm going to repeat this.

It is not your job to determine whether you are in her league or not

This is her job. This is for her to decide. If you decide this for her, then you may be right, or you may have drastically lost out. You are working with limited information and making a snap judgement based on the scraps of info you have.

No good salesman or rational thinker would make decisions based on this. All you know is how you view yourself and your own worth/attractiveness (which is often drastically diminished by your lack of self esteem) and her own attractiveness scale (which is drastically inflated by your inferiority complex to women and the fact that she is a stranger to you).

You don't however, know what's going on in her head. You expect her standards to be incredibly high, yet you have no proof of this. You don't know the type of guys she fucks, you don't know whether she's actually super horny that day, you don't know that maybe she's been eyeing you up for the past 10 minutes wondering if you were going to approach her, you don't know that she sees you as this interesting mysterious guy and has pedestalised you and really on the inside you're both freaking out about each other. It's pretty funny if you think about it.

So because you don't know any of these things, you should never make a judgement on how you think the girl will react. You will never know but are assuming she will react badly because you're terrified of rejection. Girls are much more open to being approached than you think, and they are much more intimidated by guys with the balls to approach than you think. I've had situations where I have been terrified to talk to a pretty girl with a resting bitch face and grew the balls to do it, only to find the girl is bumbling and tripping over her words because she is so flustered by the fact I spoke to her.

She is not Celibate

Let's first dispel this idea that girls have standards, as the holy prophet Mike Haines said in his wonderful Warlord post, girls don't really have standards.... or to put it in a different way, their standards are much lower than you expect them to be.

When you see a pretty girl and are getting nervous, I want you to imagine; what kind of guys has she fucked? What kind of guys are courting her right now? Think about her n-count (which will be in the double digits if she's anywhere near attractive) and think about all the guys she's allowed access between her legs.

Some of them will be high-tier alpha chads who pumped and dumped her and she still thinks about when she touches herself.

A lot more will be average guys or betas that she regrets even talking to.

She has fucked guys far uglier, stupider and beta than you. She does not exclusively bang Chads, she would if she could, but Chads are in such low quantities nowadays and in such high demand that she doesn't always have access to one for as long as she'd want.

Girls settle, and they settle all the time

You can be one of the guys she settles for. And you won't be the last.

What does a girl do when she doesn't have access to a Chad, do you think she just goes about her weeks completely celibate and not flirting with any guys?

Bullshit. Girls are horny, all the time. They are just as horny as we are. In fact majority of women make men their primary purpose of their lives. They love the contact, they love the flirting, the validation, being chased, great, animal sex. All of it.

Every single pretty girl in the 7+ range has a string of guys she's talking to that she is considering for a lay. All of these guys are nowhere near her ideal standard (which for most women is a Christian Gray or Chad Athlete type) and so she is settling for these men. She is giving them the opportunity to prove themselves attractive in other ways, even if they don't meet her physical requirements, and some may score.

Chads are rare

Chads are few and far between, especially in this day and age. The 80/20 rule always holds up, but now it is becoming increasingly hard for women to find chads because the majority of men nowadays have been completely pussified, so there are few real alphas left.

I'd say in my lecture theatre of 400 people, out of the 200 guys, I can count maybe 5 attractive chad-types.

And all 200 of the girls in that theatre are thinking about those guys, but do you think they get a shot at them?

That's 1 guy for every 40 girls. Let's say 10 of them are fuckable, do you think the dude has time to deal with the bullshit of 10 different girls? There are far too few chads for these girls to share, so the majority of them settle.

Chads do not have time to screw every single girl they meet. They have options so the turnover for girls is incredibly high (this is the position you want to eventually find yourself in).

Take it from me, I made it to Chad status. I drop plates like turds, one screw up or red flag or high-maintenance moment and I've moved on. I do not have time to juggle more than 4 girls at once, in order to do so I'd have to sacrifice the self-building activities that make me a Chad in the first place!

So these girls I throw away or ignore or have lost their chance with me, where do they go? Do you think they go about their lives waiting for the next "Mr Right" and bang no boys in the meantime? No way. They Settle, for the next best thing. You should see some of the other guys my plates are banging... it's embarrassing for them. It makes me think so poorly of them. These guys are fugly, way below my standard, but they're the guys my plates turn to when I'm "too busy" (read: banging a different plate).

There are so few Chads nowadays that girls are settling for okay-ish ugly guys who had the balls to talk to them. That's all that's required.

All you need are the balls to talk to her and not treat her like a magic princess and she may be down. Guys are such pussies nowadays that just showing you have the confidence and self worth to chat up a girl is enough to qualify yourself to her.

The Chads have pumped and dumped her, and the rest of the guys are terrified of her. You are all that's left.

You don't even need to be pretty

Remember, guys and girls are different. We are visual creatures, a girl could be a stupid shit but if she has a tight bod we'd do her.

Girls are different. Stop projecting the way you think onto the way they think. You don't need to be extremely physically attractive to get into her pants.

Of course there's a scale, but they won't automatically disqualify you as quickly as you think, and their standards for disqualification are lower than you think.

And unlike guy-attraction, girl attraction can be negotiated. She might think you're an ugly fuck and then 10 minutes later after you've made her laugh a bit she looks at you completely different. It is not a done deal, negotiation can take place. There are other factors at play.

Here's an example;

You know how sometimes you meet that one girl that you wouldn't normally find attractive; like maybe she's a 4 or 5, a bit chubby, has weird features or whatever. But there's just something about her that's alluring and hot. You can't really tell what it is, maybe the way she carries herself, maybe that cheeky glint in her eye, the way others treat her, maybe just how tuned-in she is to what's really happening around her and how socially capable she comes across.

This girl is hot and you don't know why, you wouldn't be able to explain it to your friends, you'd be embarassed to show her to your bros.

But if you got her alone you know that the sex would be wild and great and hot and you two could just "click".

In fact this girl is so alluring that you worry that she might actually think she's out of your league, even though you know you're objectively too attractive for her.

Newsflash: This is how all girls are attracted

This is how it works for all girls. Being hot is a bonus, but most girls get wet for guys in the same way that you do when you meet that enigmatic kinda ugly but irresistible girl. Once you pick up on her "inner hotness" all outward put-offs just kind of diminish.

Imagine this amplified 1000x, this is how women work.

She will make exceptions, be the exception.

Key Points:

  • Be the enigmatic, mysterious guy with the glint in his eye that drives the girl crazy, even if she's "out of your league".

  • You don't need to be Adonis, you don't need to be Chad, she has screwed guys uglier and and stupider and more beta than you.

  • Alphas are rare, girls are horny. She will make exceptions for non-Chads while she waits for Christian Gray (and the wall)

  • She is not out of your league, that's for her to decide, not you.

  • Girls standards are much lower than you think, especially their physical standards, girls settle ALL THE TIME.

  • Be the exception.