The Human Mating Dance - A 180 Degree Reframe on Conventional Red Pill Wisdom

bwazap · 2025-08-28T16:53:00+00:00

In my limited experience, I agree.

The times when things worked out, it felt like I'm "invited" and I'm supposed to advance.

I would sometimes get bad vibes when I even so much as showed a hint of non-sexual interest (eg just looking at a girl for a bit longer than usual because they looked or dressed different). Even regular non-sexual interactions would be resisted. (EDIT: this is the "i have a boyfriend!" response meme).

Sometimes when a girl was initially offended this way, but after we had hung out (in a group setting, not a date), and she found me agreeable, she would start to drop "hints".

For dates, if things were going well, the girl would make herself more... open. It's a bit hard to describe, there's too many variations, but it's mostly a vibe that one can pick up on (so, an instinctual thing).

If I failed to make a move, they would either be surprised or be annoyed. Some would then be bolder in their invites.

EDIT: example of an invite, and another one. I know there's a rule against media (because media can be misleading). But this dynamic is depicted in so many different forms in so many different shows, so there must be truth in it. Once you see it, you'll see it everywhere.

lukas_111111 · 2025-08-28T22:56:30+00:00

This is a remarkable theory that is likely true and fits with my experience. But to accept it requires a certain degree of independent and skeptical thinking, so you can except most people to dismiss/reject it, men and women alike, simply because they remain too entrapped in our cultural millieu.

I would offer an additional strong argument (and I'm surprised it's not explicitly mentioned in the article): among humans, women are obviously the ornamental sex. Think about the significance of this. In peafowl, the peacock shows off the spectacular tail and seduces the physically unremarkable peahen. Among humans, the woman puts on all sorts of clothing designed not only to accentuate her attractive features, but also to look beautiful in itself to add to the wearer's appeal, she cultivates long hair (the hair alone can be directly compared to the peacock's tail!), and on top of that invests in make-up, jewellery etc.

On the other hand, the "peak elegance" model for men is a suit, the same for everyone, with little variation, frankly making them look unremarkably similar and uncolorful, just like that poor grey peahen! I will let you make your own conclusion as to what it means in relation to this theory.

I have more things to say about the whole topic in case someone wants to engage in further discussion...

Shieldless_One · 2025-08-28T18:21:49+00:00

Women do make little approaches like he mentions but guys are so inexperienced they will hardly ever notice.

Its good to notice though but I would say to never let it engender passivity

Productivity10 · 2025-08-30T01:42:16+00:00

To argue against cold approaching means it resorting to only look space detraction which cuts out 90% of guys

Called approaching includes charisma which is a shorthand evolutionarily for the place of the person in the hierarchy

Since confidence can be learned, this gives more men a chance

It makes statistically competitive sense to cold approach because rather than just looks charisma and personality is taken into account as a cue influencing attraction

Giving more men a Fighting Chance

I also believe men can cold approach with an socially innocent opener like asking directions or clothes or contextually relevant one to avoid harsh rejections.

Simply read her body language and tone for a either cold or warm response. If cold, then you walk away after the innocent query, if warm then continue the conversation.

Has been working for me for years.

Most I've got is like 45 instas in 1 night.

And the same skill allowed me to get 99 LinkedIns at a trade show for my job.

Thorusss · 2025-09-01T06:14:57+00:00

Women might initiate by giving signals, but they for sure don't approach typically.

Sounds like a bit of a wishlist how women should behave, not what works in reality. (responding to female signals with appropriate too slightly bold moves).

The women who do directly approach a man are usually lower quality than he could get by being proactive.

redpillschool · 2025-08-28T16:00:52+00:00

I'd love to hear others' take on this theory.

FinallyRed · 2025-08-31T15:39:59+00:00

So how do we interpret the current trend of women reporting men are not approaching them? They're doing these 'micro-approaches' (which I doubt in the vast majority of cases are anything like asking for a light or fully striking up conversation) with men they're interested in and the men are not taking the hint? Why would they not be taking the hint if that's the natural status quo? Some explanations could be: these men are the best of the best and are already swamped with online options, they're too autistic to interpret the hint due to deleterious modern factors, or they are discouraged based on social commentary - probably mostly online.

Women seem a little too reticent to take a hit to their egos to progressively escalate the overtness of their 'approaches' when they're not seeing success in dating for me to take this analysis completely at face value but I think there's some truth to it.

Title	The Human Mating Dance - A 180 Degree Reframe on Conventional Red Pill Wisdom
Author	redpillschool
Upvotes	50
Comments	15
Date	August 28, 2025 4:00 PM UTC (11 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1n2g8ir/the_human_mating_dance_a_180_degree_reframe_on/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/the-human-mating-dance-a-180-degree-reframe-on.1560717 https://theredarchive.com/post/1560717

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