When I look over the posts here I see a lot of debate about what Alpha is. The thing that everyone wants to believe is that alpha is the tough guy in the movies - the man's man. We want to pack up the bags if we are not Jason Statham or a young Clint Eastwood. Even worse than that, we want to pack up the bags if we’re in our 30s, 40s, or 50s.

Here’s why: we want to believe that women are attracted to the same things in men that that we are in women. We want youth and beauty and so we think that is what women want too. They don’t.

Are you lifting to look good? Forget it. If lifting gets you someplace with women its because of what it does to your confidence and the way that you move not what it does to your looks.

Another point. I got successful in my 40s. Too old to pull right? No way. Women started hitting on me for the first time in my life. They saw success, status and someone in control of his life. Is this beta-bux? No. They were legitimately physically attracted to me because of the success.

Look around this sub and notice all of the guys who see a young woman with an older man and think she’s being disingenuous, being a gold-digger. Yes, sometimes there’s an element of calculation, but the arousal is real.

Women get turned on by success the way that we get turned on by beauty.

I was with a woman a while back who was very successful in business. She thought that made her attractive to me. Projection.

The biggest mistake you can make is to believe that they thing that makes you attractive to women is the thing that makes women attractive to you. And maybe that’s the thing that cripples AFCs: they want nice girls so they assume that women want nice boys.

Projection. Be aware of it. It hurts you.