The Devil and a Handbag. (r/Tinder)

collywobblers · 2018-06-03T22:05:56+00:00

The ex is not an ex, he's just getting cucked

where_muh_good_mens · 2018-06-03T21:46:40+00:00

She is the ultimate shit-test boss. Don't fail by accepting the challenge.

Use_VOAT_Instead · 2018-06-03T22:55:04+00:00

that's called a whore

NorthernOracle · 2018-06-04T03:23:49+00:00

Ever wonder why women put exbfs in their profile pics, or in this case the bio? On the surface level they do it because they want to say "if you're not this good don't bother me" but it goes much deeper.

It's the female mind trying to rationalize what the male mind would need to see to show that she is "valuable", because this is absolutely one way women judge the value of men, if other women want him. In fact it's usually a turn off for guys if they see a bunch of dudes circling a woman, since we value chastity. Since women value hypergamy when they see that other women want you, you instantly have value with them.

Try it on your own. Have a pic of your fit exgf hugging on you? Just put a giant smiley emoji over her head but leave it otherwise as-is. Lead with it as your main profile picture. You will get A LOT more responses

officerkondo · 2018-06-03T22:38:05+00:00

The Spanish at the end is, “so don’t fuck with me”. Nice!

buildthewallalready · 2018-06-03T21:57:59+00:00

puerto rican

Seems about right.

[deleted] · 2018-06-03T23:07:06+00:00

I forgot I was on reddit and swiped left

VanityKings · 2018-06-03T23:40:52+00:00

Which guy would be attracted to this kind of person??
It's like she is screaming at us that she has AIDS

ageontargaryarn · 2018-06-04T00:45:53+00:00

Begone Thot!

BlackHaz3 · 2018-06-04T00:10:53+00:00

This is what us Spanish folk call a "Chunti Puta"

AshyBoneVR4 · 2018-06-04T04:53:37+00:00

She's chubby. Oh, and why the hell is the ex going to pick a fight with her new dude if the ex isn't really an ex? Last.... Man i'd love to spar/fight with her ex. I'm 6'6" and 210. As a heavyweight amateur boxer, do you have any fucking idea how hard it is for me to find someone to fight in my damn weight class? I'd swipe right on this bitch just to get her exes details. I need someone to train with LOL.

Jonlife · 2018-06-04T05:13:05+00:00

Tough girl act. Her fake facade screams Daddy issues. That saying holds true.... "no matter how hot she is, there's someone who's tired of her shit..."

Xoramung · 2018-06-03T23:50:01+00:00

I think i have safer chances with the gas station surprise mixed bag of diseases than with this one.

OniTan · 2018-06-04T00:24:38+00:00

Strangle her and you're in!

JPBooBoo · 2018-06-04T01:43:24+00:00

Shit, how thirsty would you have to be...

ArmaniDiamonds · 2018-06-04T03:43:49+00:00

This is so obvious, it's almost pathetic. Pump and dump asap, king!

ButtsMacGillacuty · 2018-06-04T19:19:23+00:00

At 4'10" she's legally a midget, yet is demanding genetic perfection from her man.

WanhapXwise · 2018-06-04T04:12:34+00:00

BEGONECHOCHA

mandaros · 2018-06-04T05:37:02+00:00

What does it mean, “guys who show out?”

Reformed65 · 2018-06-04T15:48:56+00:00

Namaste

Okay okay we get it, you're different. I don't know why, when a white girl says Namaste in a casual setting, to me that's a red flag.

Must be 5'10

Ah, that's pretty generous.

6'2" 220 lbs 🇵🇷

oh fuck, 6'2? I can handle that. 220lbs? No problemo, but 🇵🇷? 🇵🇷!! No no that's where the line ends, sorry lady, I don't fuck with Puerto Ricans.

He'll most likely kick your ass.

Hm, I am so turned on, I am. Hot damn yes oh yeah baby let me have some of that ex-bf threat.

I don't have kids.

Not that I care, at this point you're the equivlenet of stepping into warzone for the sake of thrill.

Bisexual

aka future SJW.

If I swiped right it's probably bc your dog is the cute one, not so much you.

Sorry my dog is not for fucking.

Buy me food & shower me with gifts.

Does this dog-perv actually get requests? If anything, this last sentence is "hey, I'm a gold digger!"

Hablo Espanol Asi Que no me jodas

Si si mucho gracias, por favor fuck off.

rahl_r · 2018-06-04T10:02:58+00:00

Oh my. This is lobotomy-level retarded.

I'm just another dude doing his own thing at his own pace, for his own purpose and enjoyment... and here comes the Handbag Devil, with all those creative ways of telling me how and why I'm not enough, acc. to her superficial standards.

They all do this, to an extent (this one just dialed it over 9000%). The implicity of their statements communicate this: "I am better than you - therefore, jump, you lapdog."

Lady, you go find some other men to inflict pain onto, if that is your hobby...

BachelorInc · 2018-06-04T16:09:20+00:00

Nothing quite screams infantile mentality more than emojis. I can read. I don't need visual aids...Money bags 2x, lipstick, shrimp. Yeah, fuck you.

If I swiped right it's probably bc your dog is the cute one, not so much you.

So, she's already given herself plausible deniability for THE only way she could signal attraction to you? Nice! As if the condescending and princess tone of her 20 characters or less post wasn't enough. Ya, fuck off.

Buy me food & shower me with gifts

Dressed like that, I wouldn't want you standing anywhere near me in public. Those shorts look like a $2 street whore in TJ.

Must be 5'10+ idc idc if I"m 4'10

So, your a veritable midget. You "dc" that you're for all intents and purposes a 'little person'; you pass it off as a good thing and still DEMAND at least a foot more of man-meat. Unreal.

Btw, what the fuck does the phrase - " guys who show out " mean? Is she trying to say "guys who show off"?

sleepyweaselisawake · 2018-06-04T20:25:53+00:00

"Bisexual"

I've made out with chicks for free drinks and attention. I've fucked hot guys and their GFs, but those days are over.

CompletelyIncorrect0 · 2018-06-05T07:42:12+00:00

What I hate most is how unoriginal they are on Tinder.

The line about swiping because of a dog and the one saying "buy me food" is in 90% of female profiles.

dead_man_dreaming · 2018-06-04T06:21:45+00:00

so nasty..

T0000009 · 2018-06-05T00:42:45+00:00

No thanks tramp...

I doubt your convict fuckboi could take me toots
Don't worry I wont waste my time trying
My dog is cuter than you and more loyal
It's my money bitch, go get your own
I have a great relationship with my mom so Fuck off
You don't have kids here legally... In this country??
I'll shower you with disdain and contempt, not much else
You're not worth a meal, probably not worth motel 6 either

silver-in-a-cloud · 2018-06-05T23:33:43+00:00

the ex who is actually still on her plating menu ... has a large cock and has dug the hole so deep, that unless you are 1 whole foot taller than this bitch ...she wont be able to feel a thing ... thus all the height and weight of ex description -she really felt the need to subtly yet not so subtly imply that size matter a lot for her and she can take extra large :)

bitch just felt ashamed to say she needs like 13inch minimum

Ghustgan · 2018-06-05T14:46:10+00:00

Thots like this one waste my oxygen. I can be mad about that.

immex5live · 2018-06-08T09:39:16+00:00

Goddamit another one? Buy your own damn food!

thePloweHorse · 2018-06-09T10:13:36+00:00

"Alpha" widows aren't worth any man's time.

anongogogo · 2018-06-11T05:20:40+00:00

Tinder thots are delusional lol.

tractorferret · 2018-07-24T22:21:43+00:00

"Dog is the cute one not you" Lol my dog wouldn't even sniff these women. I taught him not to sniff trash.

escalover · 2018-06-08T07:30:52+00:00

So she comes prepackaged with a psycho ex?

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