I just need advice from someone who has been through this before. My ex (25m) and I (25f) broke up exactly a year ago because he had cheated. I basically went NC where he was blocked from January- July 2021 because I was getting too much anxiety and he kept reaching out. However, I unblocked him because I thought I was over him and living my best life. He reached out in July to congratulate me on my new job which he found on linkedin-- which I simply responded thank you. During this time I felt no anxiety which is rare! However, he reached out last week and apologized for what he did, how I didn't deserve it, how he hopes I find someone that can treat me better in the future and keep me happy, how he still thinks about me a lot more than I think he does and is not in a relationship bc he cannot commit and cannot hurt another person. This didn't give me any anxiety either but felt like an ego boost.

But things changed 4 days ago, where we hadn't talked in a few days-- I started to get anxious again. I had a feeling where I felt he was seeing someone and lied to my face but just didn't have enough proof. So without nagging him (like I used to), I blocked him off of every platform including LinkedIn without any communication and kind of just fell off the face of the earth for him.

But since two days ago, I kind of still feel anxious and feel sad that I blocked him. Idk why because he did me dirty numerous times and is overall an LVM and our relationship was NV. So I wanted to know from someone who has been in a similar situation-- does it get better? I thought it did and now I feel im kinda feeling the same way I did last year. I now have no interest in dating bc I'm so turned off by the whole process.

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Any advice would be helpful!

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Thanks!