We got married young, but full in love and still are. The punches have really knocked us over in life but we are finally in a place of financial stability.

On top of that, we were smoking cannabis every day which I think led to our problems today. And today was the last straw.

I've been lurking around here for a few months after reading on dbr. Realized the dbr is a side effect of everything else. I gained weight, lived paycheck to paycheck, arguing every day about nothing, etc. Same problems you commonly read around here about sex not being what it used to be.

I started counting macros how I used to before. I've been doing a lot of STFU and keeping frame by sticking to my guns even if they sound horrible and hurt her feelings - not intentional of course. Yesterday she started shouting over god knows what, i told her im not talking like this and I left. I told her theres a line and your depression/anxiety cannot cross that line. She yelled at me to come back and she said i can't handle it and i told her i can, and it's true the only reason i left is because I'm not tolerating disrespect and yelling. I admit my faults to her, and agree with the ugly, and again tell her if she's gonna act like a child I'm walking away.

She has clinical depression, ADHD, etc.. But i haven't been understanding to her medications and correlation to low libido. Trying to now, just not what I'm used to.

What I've done to help the situation:

We both agreed to stop smoking weed until we establish an emotional connection again. If we smoke it'll be for purpose of fun (sex, going out, etc). But not habitually as soon as we wake up every day. Too much is not good.

I don't skip the gym or counting calories. I only cheat once a week and thats by taking her out to eat, etc.

STFU

She's definitely feeling depressed especially without the daily smoking. But I think it's necessary to cut down so we can keep our foundation steady. There is no way we can have an emotional connection if we are just potheads all day.

I think I'm heading the right direction here. Let me know if you have questions. Give it to me hard, I just feel like this is the answer to the daily arguing, the fact that she never remembers her reactions/attitude.

I love my wife, and i want nothing more than for her to be happy. Dealing with her depression/anxiety is definitely contagious as well and I'm snapping out of it. Essentially my foot has been put down. We have been arguing non stop for a year.

Thanks for reading.