What am I missing here?

Brief history, on off turbulent relationshit with LTR for 8 years, last 2 years not split up. We have 3 kids, a 2 year old with her, my own 12 year old and she has a 9 Year old from a previous relationship.

The problem is over living arrangements, currently she stays at my house 3 nights a week. That works great for me. There are some issues that I can’t go into for opec reasons that would prevent me moving to a bigger house. Her other kid doesn’t stay here often and when he does it’s just a fold up bed type thing so it’s not ideal.

The reoccurring issue is about how much time we spend together and me not sleeping over at her house. I’m not willing to move on that, I like sleeping in my own house. The complaints are that she lives out of a bag while she’s here (yes I already gave her a draw). What is the way round this? Is there one? Or do i just hold frame and wait for her to get used to it. I’m as happy as I can be with the situation atm, I mean it’s not ideal but I know the plan and I’m willing to be patient and live like this for now. Other than this things are fine no major issues in the relationship, My life would be the exactly the same tomorrow if I were to become single today. I’ve explained if she’s not happy she can walk away at any time she likes but this is how things are for now and they aren’t going to change in the near future. I wasn’t planning on breaking up but I’m starting to think that being single would be a lot better for me. Should I even be giving in at all here and providing some extra commitment?