Married for 8 years, have one toddler and another baby on the way. Used to be fat as hell, lost 200 lbs a few years ago and purchased a power rack last year. My wife followed suit and lost a bunch of weight as well.

I’ve been lifting for a year, getting fit, dressing better. Sold my company last year and I’ve been building a few side projects.

Our sex life is boring (my fault). We have passionate sex about every other month. Aside from that it’s mostly starfish once a week or so. I’ve just been consuming the sidebar and reading materials the past few weeks after discovering this place. I’ve been making small dominance changes in how I respond and make decisions. One of my wife’s big things are compliance tests asking me to fill up her water, take a plate to the sink, etc. Yesterday she asked me to fill up her water, and I looked at her and said “last I checked you have legs, go get some”. She whined, pleaded, said how I needed to take care of my pregnant wife. I just laughed and finished up some work I had.

She was clearly very upset, I came to bed around midnight, she said “You know, you haven’t been very attentive to me lately. Our marriage isn’t going to be like this”. It was hard for me not to laugh, but I slightly chuckled and just went to sleep.

I’m sure the follow up today is coming, she’s going to want to have a long chat about it. I could really use some examples or guidance here. Need to read more, but also need to stop failing stupid tests. My instinct is to just laugh, because having a fight about not filling your water is laughable, but I’m guessing there are more effective approaches here.