Does TRP kill love?

afterthe_fapocalypse · 2020-06-24T20:44:55+00:00

Love is a choice. It doesn't have to be an emotion, but it's often helpful if supported by affectionate feelings. When you love someone, you will their good - through words, actions, and in your heart ultimately. This is how we can love even an enemy. We don't have to feel lovey dovey about them, and I'm sure we often don't.

Ultimately TRP is a perspective on human behavior, particularly intersexual dynamics. It provides a framework of analysis, but doesn't need to be THE analysis. God says what God says and His word is final. Think of TRP as a tool in your kit to use here and there but not the end all and be all.

When you're thinking about loving a woman, we don't really love them in the sense that some other commentators here state, like she's some video game goddess or pedestalized fantasy. Women don't want that either. Love requires a grasp of who the person really is. Otherwise it can be adulation or infatuation or whatever, and that isn't love. When you love someone, you see them ... and that love is tested when you are aware of that person's flaws and yet still love him/her.

I've found it's a lot easier to retain my sense of rootedness in self and frame when I love a woman outside of a romantic setting. It really makes one aware of the difference between love and fleshly attraction. I'm not saying being attracted at a sexual level to a woman is twisted and evil, but taht is not love.

So saying that you're going to just desire her sexually is really objectifying her and focusing on your needs. If you're going to go that way, then yeah, you've killed love. You've killed your heart off.

Look, some women do really bad things. Some choose evil. Sounds like you've been hurt which brought you to this edge of a decision. You don't post a lot haha so I'm giving you the benefit of a doubt you're not a psychopath. But what I'm saying is that when you love with God's kind of love and recognize how you are forgiven and loved, how can you not love others? Mourning their self-destruction is a kind of love.

Ultimately, God's kind of love as He is teaching me puts the other person first before oneself. If you don't want to love them, that's that, but if you do, you put them first. And loving someone else that way comes through association with the Holy Spirit, through studying and understanding human behavior instead of ridiculing it, through seeing someone not through our own needs/wants but through theirs and through God's eyes. Honestly, if I can put it the most basic way, the more you pray the more you turn godly. There's more than one adage that you can tell a man by the company he keeps, and the more we pray, the more God is that company. When we follow God instead of even ourselves, He changes us. He makes us the way we can be. There is peace in this.

Deep_Strength · 2020-06-26T06:24:24+00:00

I don’t think I’ll ever “love” again or at least the way I thought love was supposed to be like.

If your "love" was based in infatuation and ONEitis then hopefully not.

Next time I get a girl, I’d pretty much just desire her sexually and to create some babies and start a family. I don’t think I’d love her emotionally if that makes sense. I’d treat her right and respect her and be kind but definitely won’t be bringing flowers every month.

You're thinking about this wrongly.

You can live how you want to live. If you want to do tons of romantic things for the woman you potentially marry even knowing what you know now then go for it. If you don't then don't.

The issue isn't doing those things. It's who they're coming from and intent. Remember, flowers from an attractive man is romantic and from an unattractive man is a creep.

Marry someone who is appreciative of what you bring to the table for them.

redwall92 · 2020-06-24T18:39:36+00:00

Define love; maybe your question will mean something.

If by "love", you define it as bringing flowers every month ... then sure. Kill that flower-loving-puppy with some RP and get a life.

If by "love", you define it as wrapping up your happiness in someone else's? ... then yeah ... kill that co-dependant puppy with some RP, too.

Define your terms, bro.

If you're still "healing" like you describe in your post a month ago ...

https://www.reddit.com/r/askRPC/comments/gkzzg0/how_to_heal_from_previous_relationship/

... then "loving" a woman in a relationship context should be waaaay off your radar. You can't love someone from a place of neediness.

Willow-girl · 2020-06-26T11:59:35+00:00

I think the danger of TRP is that if you are led to believe all women are childlike irrational creatures, that's the kind of woman you'll end up with. You won't set your sights on better because you'll believe they don't exist.

It's like a woman who thinks all men are cheaters, so she ends up with ... a cheater, because she didn't bother to vet for qualities like faithfulness.

Beware.

Praexology · 2020-06-25T17:48:24+00:00

The issue you're struggling with (AWALT) needs to come with the concession that women still have autonomy. God created men and women both with free will, and as such a woman can still deny her sinful side (the ego driven and sexually immoral side of hypergamy) to be pure, and to show God glory.

The Lord would not create a being without the intention of Glorifying himself, and the devastating idea of women being totally depraved and victim to their sinful behavior without any chance of turning towards God through Christ would NOT be glorifying.

You just have to be careful to find and pick out a woman who values those things. (Having a big tits or a phat booty helps a LOT.) Plus some of them can even be funny!

FrankTheCurious · 2020-06-30T01:43:11+00:00

What is Love to you?

If you read TRP you need to understand how men and women love differently, thats how we were made, for a reason.

Title	Does TRP kill love?
Author	agoodcrayon
Upvotes	5
Comments	22
Date	June 24, 2020 6:30 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askRPC
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askRPC/comments/hf6gm6/does_trp_kill_love/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askRPC/does-trp-kill-love.700001 https://theredarchive.com/post/700001

Comments