A failed comfort test?

Kidterrific · 2020-03-02T21:10:13+00:00

Don’t take this bait. This is a manipulation tactic. She’s already angling to make this more than an FWB.

KillaJewels · 2020-03-02T21:12:57+00:00

She wants to open up (be vulnerable with you), and you respond without empathy in an uncalibrated manner. You read her incorrectly. That broke trust.

Protocol_Apollo · 2020-03-02T22:19:02+00:00

Your second message “you should try it” was the issue. Came across as too much of a dick.

Remember law of saying less than necessary? / the rule of 2:3?

The other message “depends...” could have just been shortened to:

“depends 😏”

Or:

“Tell me in person” then hear her out if you want, change topic and continue as normal. Control the frame.

Most of the time girls just ignore the depends thing and fire off whatever’s in her mind anyway (that’s what I notice).

This was a bit rare for her to backtrack after the first message.

Sometimes it can help to throw in some comfort (tiny bits) with plates, it can help them last longer but don’t try to be an emotional tampon for her AND the alpha fucks. That’s how she’ll lose attraction/push for commitment as you’ll be giving boyfriend vibes.

Be unpredictable: sometimes be a straight dick, sometimes be a playful dick and sometimes hear her out but control the frame. Don’t just sit there and take in everything she complains about.

You aren’t her therapist. Being a therapist sucks, doing it over text/phone sucks even more.

For now, just soft next or hit her up again next week.

Bone_Coat · 2020-03-02T22:43:03+00:00

I think you broke the plate

Domebeers · 2020-03-02T22:15:45+00:00

You responded to it perfectly, you were clear you aren't her boyfriend. That's a good play.

lolomotif12 · 2020-03-02T22:22:12+00:00

She wants to progress things, she withdrew attention when she got the reaction she didnt want/expect in hope to reel you in to message her and ask her what's she wanted to open up about or ask her what's wrong. Ignore her till she reaches out, if not just message her like nothing has happened.

Snowboard18 · 2020-03-03T03:13:50+00:00

Your response was way too try hard at trying to be alpha. Kinda funny

Title	A failed comfort test?
Author	Advicethrowaway372
Upvotes	4
Comments	22
Date	March 2, 2020 8:52 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/fcirju/a_failed_comfort_test/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/a-failed-comfort-test.351725 https://theredarchive.com/post/351725

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