Found TRP about a month ago, have been doing a lot of reading, lifting, working hard etc. I cut out porn, video games, and TV in order to better use my time. Basically just making my life the best I can.

I found the sub through a comment to a post I had made about my wife in r/relationships (complete BS sub). Luckily there was someone there who pointed me to TRP. The more I read the more it makes sense, and I have been trying to adopt RP mentality. But I have a long way to go.

Long story short my wife gave me the ILYBINILWY. She has been seeing another guy. Not a Chad, but another beta. He sends her all kinds of messages about how much he loves her and how much she means to him. I think it has something to do with how her father left when she was 7 and she reacts to attention from other men very favorably. I can't help but feel jealous about it, thinking that should be me.

I'll be frank. I have oneitis (if it wasn't obvious). I have been with her for a decade and she is the only person I have ever had a relationship like this with. I know it's wrong to think this way. I know I need to adopt an abundance mentality and tell her to hit the bricks. She's not a unicorn. She isn't good for my life, but I still want her.

She brought home divorce papers for child custody of our daughter yesterday. Once those are filled out she can file and it will take 90 days to process. I am speaking to a lawyer so I can protect myself in case she comes after me for anything other than child support. I don't think that will be the case, she has never been a vengeful or vindictive person and has said she wants no alimony because she does not want to depend on me in that way. But I want to be prepared. Divorce can do crazy things to people.

All I can fucking think about is how much I don't want this to happen, how I want to spend those 90 days with her, to try to convince her to not go through with this. It's embarrassing to admit, but I've been having some serious thoughts about telling her this. If this does go through and I end up on the other side with nothing but child custody to pay it will be the best thing for me. I know it, but I don't want it yet. The beta is still strong. Any advice on getting over this?