Confronting a girl I've been orbiting

JimFury · 2016-04-17T06:48:19+00:00

You don't. You have oneitis and she sees you as a beta chump. You have two options, call her up tell her to come watch a movie. Put the moves on her. If she rejects you then you move on and learned it first hand. Your other option is to listen to us because we all know you will fail with this chick because she sees you as a beta. From this post it sounds like she would fuck a Chad but not you. You're just not there man. You're her buddy. Give it a shit and move on.

edwardhwhite · 2016-04-17T07:01:02+00:00

you must bail on her. abundance mentality will follow

raceAround126 · 2016-04-17T08:57:37+00:00

Dude, you're overthinking all of this. The way all your posts are worded, you've already lost!

You've had advice, unfortunately there are no magic lines you can say or magic pills you can take. This girl has already categorized you and filed you away like a library reference card.

Give up, move on, save your charged confrontation meltdown for the fantasy in your head and get on with your life. I can assure you, your attempts to shame her into sex will get you nowhere than at best her telling everyone that knows you that you're a dangerous creep or at worst on a register of some kind.

Either have her over for the movie and escalate plan and when she shuts you down, grab a beer, enjoy the rest of the movie and kick her out afterwards with a smirk on your face, or just don't bother with her anymore. There are a lot more girls out there, you just fucked up with this one, take the experience and move on!

BlackPhoenix01 · 2016-04-17T11:17:47+00:00

I spent my younger years being vindicative and telling calling girls out on their BS. What did that accomplish.

Absolutely nothing

You'll either get a 'oh geez, no need to get your panties in a bunch' or 'yeah, I'm not attracted to you.'

Girls these days, by and large, are not accountable, and there isn't a damn thing you and I can do about that. The only thing you should do is walk away, because she isn't deserving of any more of your attention.

It's going to be hard, and as someone who's fighting off oneitis myself, it's going to take a crap ton of discipline. But it'll be worth it

massageanest · 2016-04-17T06:31:58+00:00

Stop orbiting her. She has other orbiters. You are nothing but validation to her. When you stop giving her attention she will get it from somewhere else. She does not care about you and you will not be missed.

This girl is a lost cause, but the next one won't be. You haven't gotten physical because she isn't attracted to you. Work on yourself—monk mode.

Read the sidebar.

Lsegundo · 2016-04-17T14:50:35+00:00

Tell her not to call you until she is ready to fuck and next her. Completely moving on is probably even better advice.

Time for a funny story. Years ago I had an ex that I would bump into often at the club. She would take my drunk ass back to her place and not fuck me. This happened a bunch of times. I was getting frustrated so my bro advises me to tell her "call me when you want to fuck" and next her.

A week or two later I'm back at my place after the club having sex for the third time with a new woman. My house phone rings and I let the machine get it. It was on the loudest setting. Just as things were getting good in bed over the answering machine speaker comes "Hi Lsegundo it's supertits. You told me to call you when when I want to fuck" I start cracking up. I dated the woman I was in bed with for years and we would joke all the time about the message supertits left on my answering machine.

Late30sMasculist · 2016-04-17T12:08:03+00:00

I "confronted" a few girls that I was orbiting way back in my younger days. The number of times it successfully turned the relationship sexual: ZERO.

Confront her, embarrass yourself, and learn that it never works. Or listen to the people here and just walk from this one. You have a lot of work to do on yourself before you start banging attractive women.

stonepimpletilists · 2016-04-17T14:33:40+00:00

Don't. Expressing your feelings to a girl you're LTR with is a recipie for disaster. for one who really doesn't care? Even worse.

Get it through your thick skull, no one cares how you feel, now go be a man and just ghost the dead weight, lift for a while, and think about why you get put in a friends zone

trp-throw · 2016-04-17T15:34:55+00:00

I just recently started reading TRP I want to confront her for optimal results.

You clearly haven't been reading enough

She also flirts with me often, makes dirty jokes, and we hangout often.

That's how women keep you their orbiter, they give you hope but never the actual pussy

I fell for it for too long and I'm trying to change and be her alpha.

If you're doing this to be her alpha then you're doing it wrong, read more about oneitis

Save yourself the trouble and move on, this is a lost cause.

mbillion · 2016-04-17T17:50:25+00:00

It is so beta to lash out in this situation its not even funny

OhTheShenanigans · 2016-04-17T21:40:43+00:00

You need to break away and work on bettering yourself, then fuck one or more of her friends after your SMV has risen.

F_Dingo · 2016-04-18T01:30:53+00:00

Stop talking to her and hanging out with her, cut all contact basically. The dirty talk, flirting, and constant hangouts are to keep you hooked in thinking you have a chance with her.

The thing is you don't have a chance with her, you're her emotional tampon, a platonic friend.

WrensPens · 2016-04-17T06:23:32+00:00

Find other girls. Fuck these girls. Best case scenario, she gets jealous and wants you for herself. Worse case scenario, you still get laid and over her.

Throwaway244555 · 2016-04-17T07:11:28+00:00

Go read the sidebar

Title	Confronting a girl I've been orbiting
Author	TheRedestRed
Upvotes	7
Comments	38
Date	April 17, 2016 6:14 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/4f5j7m/confronting_a_girl_ive_been_orbiting/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/confronting-a-girl-ive-been-orbiting.104071 https://theredarchive.com/post/104071

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