The girl who red pilled me texted me. She wants me back.

No lie, this is probably the happiest I’ve been in a while, the other girls don’t compare, something about being broken with someone else makes things much more interesting.

Here’s the catch tho, as much as I love her, I HATE HER MORE. I wanna get tangled into things with her and make her an Alpha Widow. She’s been baiting me with videos of the past, selfies we took together, came to deliver my jerseys back, sending nudes, etc. but there’s nothing I want to do more than break her psychologically for all the pain she’s caused.

Sadism aside, I know you’re gonna hit me with the abundance mentality, never get back with the ex thing. But hear me out.

1) Does the fact that she kept everything while she was with other dude show that in some ways I did make inroads into her psyche and stuff?

2) I really don’t want to hold on to the hate, but it’s apart of me. Otherwise I wouldn’t have changed. So how do I let go of that?

Am seeing someone else too, for context.