Broad background info:

Started dating in undergrad. Both of us struggle with communication and assertiveness in our own way and it has put stress on the relationship and caused problems in the past. In general she is very non confrontational. I can be sometimes as well.

She graduated last year and has since been working on her masters which keeps her very stressed and busy. She arrives home from work tired. She doesn't have a lot of time and is admittedly bad at managing her time between work, family, friends, me, etc. Not an uncommon problem. She lives with her family who can be a little old fashioned and she chooses to lie and deceive them in order to do what she wants eg staying out late with me. This is quite obviously learned behavior because I've seen her family pull the same shit between each other. I see a lot of red flags from her family but she is not entirely like them and has been a great source of support in my life.

I have one more year of undergrad. This summer I am working 10 hour days as an intern. I don't have a great deal of friends but don't get me wrong, when I'm not with her, I'm usually doing something. I go out with coworkers often and I see my other friends when they have time - they have girlfriends, jobs, or other stuff going on. And I play video games and reddit and watch TV if I got nothing else to do. I also live at home with family but they treat me like an adult and I am able to do my own thing for the most part.

In general, I have more free time than her, and have repeatedly expressed to her that I don't get to see her often enough. There are times when I feel as if I'm in a long distance relationship. I simply don't want this type of relationship. I want to see my SO in person at least 3 times a week and sex 2 times per week. This isn't a firm rule for me just a guide and I've told her the same. Getting privacy can be tough since we both live at home but not impossible. There are clear opportunities that come up almost weekly. We also agreed to do things like Tuesday movie night and at least one weekend night or day together. It's not 3 days and not 2 fucks but I can be happy with this.

The problem is the plan rarely happens. The past two months the arrangement has fully worked for two weeks. The other 6 being seeing each other once, maybe having sex once, or nothing at all. It feels like we are in a relationship only by appearances rather than reality sometimes. She takes it very personally when I express to her that I'm unhappy with how things are going and often plays the victim.

Specific background info:

Three weeks ago, I tried to break up with her after she ditched me for a night out with her girlfriends but she admitted she was wrong and she convinced me to give us another chance. She said she had trouble telling me that she wanted a girls night out and that's why she agreed to hang out with me that night even though she had plans. And btw I have no issue with her wanting friend time but I simply don't want to go a full week without seeing her in person or having sex and I certainly don't want to be deceived or ditched if she has other plans . Talking on the phone with her is just her bitching about her day, me offering my support then talking about my day a bit. It doesn't do much for me.

We rediscussed the plan and re-committed to it. We talked about improving communication and assertiveness and we agreed to be open and honest if the plan wasn't working so we could reevaluate and maybe try something else. I was happy and confident with this and the makeup sex was amazing.

Week 1 - we go to a cottage together for 3 days and sex three times. We have a great time. I miss this

Week 2 - we don't see a movie on Tuesday and her little step brother visits on the weekend so no sex but she invited me to join them for two days on the weekend and we had fun

The main reason I'm posting:

Week 3 - we don't see a movie on Tuesday, and I made plans to go away for Saturday and Sunday. Friday (yesterday) was up in the air and I didn't communicate until Thursday morning that I'd be in the city Friday night. She gets upset when I ask her to go out Friday night. Says that her step brother is visiting again. I say that she would see him 2 days and me 1 night. She got upset and I backed off. I texted her a bit Friday night but she was unusually unresponsive. I am suspicious of her now and more critical of her claim that her step brother is visiting two weekends in a row. This morning I decide to stop by her house to pick up something I had been meaning to retrieve from her. I called her a few times but no answer. Her family answers the door and tell me she slept at a friend's. So she lied. And her excuse to her family may also be a lie because it's her go to lie when she's with me. I act like nothings wrong and leave.

Now I am just furious and trying to cool down and enjoy my weekend before I confront her. I plan to end things but my sister doesn't think I should be so quick. Should I try to talk with her or is this a huge red flag on top of our other issues that should be the end of our relationship? Anyone been in a similar situation? How did you handle it? I still love her but I'm interested in having a relationship with an adult and not put up with this bullshit.

tl;dr Girlfriend lied to me about weekend plans in order to avoid confrontation. I am feeling very hurt. Almost broke up three weeks ago over similar issue. Other issues not getting better. I have little hope for a future with her but I still do love her. How should I handle this? Is this worth discussion with her or should I just end it?