How can I be more assertive and dominant at work as a regular employee?

KurkTheMagnificent · 2021-03-28T04:05:48+00:00

Same here. Being a compliant, push-over betatized, who smiled and nodded to everything and anything was really making me miserable and I saw no future.

Quit the corporate world. Go into sales. Do anything else. Be dominant if you wish but chances are the PC feminized work culture will boot you out.

Don_Draper27 · 2021-03-28T13:10:59+00:00

Why is it black and white? You're either passive, or you get in trouble for being an asshole?

If power and the food chain are that important for you, then yea go into sales; where manipulation, charisma, and influence are encouraged.

Me personally, I'm happy just putting my head down, riding the flow of my work, and letting my skills talk for me. I don't need to "prove" anything when people see my craft and go "wow!"

I don't need to dominate or be assertive when my manager transfers the spot light to me during a presentation and says, "Don has been wonderful and has produced the following beautiful project."

That's just MY mission. I'm satisfied and fulfilled just being the professional. I work very well with people, but I personally will probably never want to be in charge of a team or be in charge of a whole company. The stress involved is not something I want or need.

Used_Hovercraft9634 · 2021-03-28T12:38:54+00:00

you sound like you're on a high ass horse you're not special

oooKenshiooo · 2021-03-28T15:09:10+00:00

Either shut up and work, or be your own boss.

Guzzy9 · 2021-03-28T12:51:35+00:00

I would say it is not about being dominant... but it is about being assertive. You don't have to be the dominant person, but you can be respected, you can be someone who others trust and listen to, and go for advice.

In companies, culture is usually different than your personal life experience ... so you have to meld in with their culture to degree that you fit in. If you don't resonate with their culture, then you just won't have a good time. To be less abstract, as an example, look at team leads, managers, those who are respected and have high status and observe what they do ... and how they interact with others.

It is actually pretty natural for it to be hard to adjust to a company's culture. It takes time, it's a new environment.

I would say that ...

You don't have to like someone or become good friends with someone at work, but you can respect them.
Aggressive and controlling behavior is not going to help you here at all, so ditch hoping that you'll be able to be aggressive, and keep respect from most people there. Try to channel this energy to productive time, perhaps into creativity, I am sure you can find something. I am also not saying to be a beta.

How long do you work there ? This is important to know, because if you work there for a long time, then maybe you should switch your job, since it seems that it doesn't fit your personality and vision. If you work there just for some time, ~few months, then be open, try to see how you can fit there. Bottomline, it really depends on company's values, culture if your style would fit there as well.

redresc · 2021-03-28T14:09:29+00:00

RP has skewed your idea of how things work and how you think you are - if you attempt anything to the degree of asserting your ego into the job, they'll show you the door.

I'd say how you are at work is the real you, which is good because work is half our lives - and/or it would seem your job is your master and controls you - You want to be and do different things, but you can't and won't because you might rock the boat and lose it, and you don't want that because - money and consumer shit you want.

Good_Click_565 · 2021-03-28T14:26:04+00:00

Better to remain low key. Be more like Batman, less like superman

Unbiased101 · 2021-03-28T15:01:47+00:00

the only time i could prob be somewhat considered beta is at work - I work with all females and i rather not lose my career. I’m very assertive and dominant etc but i for sure turn it down a few notches - Don’t shit where you eat anyways

Drewsef916 · 2021-03-28T03:12:03+00:00

Get a new job

Title	How can I be more assertive and dominant at work as a regular employee?
Author	nicholasbuchanan
Upvotes	10
Comments	20
Date	March 28, 2021 3:00 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/met3ms/how_can_i_be_more_assertive_and_dominant_at_work/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-can-i-be-more-assertive-and-dominant-at-work.779197 https://theredarchive.com/post/779197

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