How can I make programming attractive or masculine?

RemyPrice · 2015-07-24T10:16:49+00:00

"If you've used an iPhone today, you've probably seen my work."

This line has gotten me laid an embarrassing amount of times.

H3lius · 2015-07-24T15:36:25+00:00

Hey fellow homeschooler! Glad to know I'm not alone ;). We have a lot in common it seems. I'm also a giant nerd myself and work as an architecture/linux engineer for a major corporation.

You cannot masculinize computers or IT. Nor should you. First, work and life are separate things. What you do does not make you who you are. Second, programming is an intellectual occupation. If you're worried about looking like a pussy when you tell someone what you do, you're in the wrong mindset. Change your mindset bro! intellectual occupations are in right now. It's cool to be a nerd/geek these days.

It's not about gaining acceptance for what you do. Accept yourself for the kick ass shit you've done in your life so far and how much of a boss you'll be in 10 years if you're still working on self-improvement and TRP.

Read: "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" (book on amazon)

If you're ever in Northern Virginia/D.C., let me know and we'll sync up.

throwawaymatthew · 2015-07-24T09:41:14+00:00

Try lifting weights and being a human tank, I think they will get the picture.

FrameWalker · 2015-07-24T13:30:50+00:00

Let me tell you what a programmer is. It's a man that makes his living creating ideas that travel the world at nearly the speed of light. He can sit in a cafe anywhere in the world and type away at his macbook, wearing his chinos and tailored Oxford cotton button down. He's a man with the power to be free. Nothing more masculine than that

SkorchZang · 2015-07-24T12:21:36+00:00

Set aside some time every week to plant yourself into "wild nature". IT work has a way of draining the spontaneous serendipity that is such a boost to Game. Even in cases where you have very little else going for you, the spontaneous vibe wins the day. I have no idea what does it, the sitting posture, the screens, the abstraction, but something's going on. And you can counteract it, by planting your naked ass in a raging ant hill, then running with the tarzan scream and just swimming in some lake for a while. You come out a different man, now it doesn't matter what your job title says. Those eyes have fire, and suddenly its like "omg the way he said Software was soooo sexy".

Myrpl · 2015-07-24T10:49:48+00:00

The thing is, unless your goal is to go for something long term, girls won't bother with how you're getting your income (unless it's something blatantly obviously immoral like being a criminal). I've had a guy who was taller than me, was working out, had green eyes and all the pack that gets girls wet and he was a programming wizard, the type of "my distro is Arch Linux because I care about my computer's performance" kind of guy. But when he was talking to girls he had the "air of abundance" the kind of "I'm going to be me and I don't care if you stick around or not". He ended up having a relationship with one of the hottest girls in the university.

My point being, experiment with different hobbies. Buy a bicycle and get into a bicycle club where they go to the countryside every weekend. Get into rafting, swimming, play basketball/football with others etc. If somehow nothing clicks to you, just make sure you socialize and workout often. Don't force yourself to grab hobbies for the sake of having hobbies, unless you like them.

1NV0K3R · 2015-07-24T14:27:52+00:00

There's a lot of good shit in here.

When girls ask what I do:

"I work for the government. With computers. That's all I can tell you."

Boom. Instant mystery + social status (he has clearance, is a big shot, whatever).

While I'm lying out of my fucking ass (I work for a shit emergency management software company), these plates wouldn't fucking know the difference.

The only problem is when you accidentally bump into a girl who actually does the same shit and starts drillin you...

Asoka11111 · 2015-07-24T12:27:27+00:00

If you're really struggling with this, research and strive to embody the brogrammer archetype. True, the tech scene has expanded to (somewhat forcibly) include women, but you know what else it brought? Alpha males. No longer can programming be classified as an interest/hobby/obsession solely for the meek.

As someone who is also delving into this, FUCKING LIFT. Some other things you can do:

Make sure to do some reading on social dynamics. The sidebar is the bar minimum, but head over to redpillbooks for further reading.

Of course, redpillcomedy and redpillmedia exist for leisure time, but it is preferable if you spend that time either honing your craft to esoteric levels or engaging in other masculine interests.

To keep it simple, just actively strive to break the beta STEM male archetype that a lot of people (especially girls) will try to box you into as an effort to be intellectually efficient (read:lazy).

ghostCanape · 2015-07-24T18:29:57+00:00

I can definitely relate to the question as a fellow ex-homeschooler in IT. Being a bit older than OP, programming wasn't quite yet 'cool' in the way it has now become when I was in university.

However as I moved into the real world and gained responsibilities, I found that selling programming as a creative profession that does important shit became notably easier. Improved physical fitness certainly helped. Business networking and continued partying expanded on the social skills honed by my time as an active Fraternity member. And it didn't hurt that I dressed and talked like a graphic designer, rather than some Bucky Beta nerd.

In other words, I had become a brogrammer. If you'd like an archetypal answer to your question, this is the one. Any difficulties I've had with the opposite sex since I first approximated it have been strictly due to my game or personal incompatibility, literally never once my profession. Moreover, I've absolutely been able to use my ability to discuss aspects of my profession coherently as a demonstration of my intelligence or influence without projecting incongruence since I never cover up that I'm a bit nerdy.

My advice to you would be to loosen up about it a little bit and acknowledge that your nerdery is the source of your worldly influence. Clearly you've got other things going on in your life, so talk about those instead. "Oh, computers? Those are just how I make my piles of money. Now, can I freshen your drink?" You may also find investigating the Sigma archetype worthwhile. I realized that being a natural Sigma rather than the Beta stereotype of the profession or a Alpha better explained my outlook and attitude, including my ability to project low-level Dark Triad.

Feel free to DM me, I'm always open to advising juniors.

aguy01 · 2015-07-24T16:15:09+00:00

The ideal candidate for a long term relationship is Alpha Bucks. If you are an alpha personality that lifts and does MMA, but you program for a living, you will have a super easy time leading women on and having long relationships. Your own morality determines how you lead them on, but the physically alpha programmer is a great way to get long term pussy from multiple women who think you will be the perfect guy to golddig.

ScottRikkard · 2015-07-24T12:28:41+00:00

I dont think it's as important as you think it is. Careers are not relevant until you turn around 25 and become a prospect for beta buxing a bitch. And even then never brag about your income or disclose it to anyone especially women.

What is important with women are appearances. If you dress well, act well (prizing yourself above everything), you will be alright.

I never thought programming is considered not - masculine. It's a great paying career and as a way of thinking it's even more awesome. It seems to me you are searching for your style, when you find it, profession will not matter.

You are still in an age bracket where sex comes easy with a right attitude even if you're a junky.

3rt41 · 2015-07-24T14:45:14+00:00

Dig into the character of Joe Mc Millan from the show "Halt and catch fire"

kireol · 2015-07-24T15:50:18+00:00

Women will care more about your income and your status in your job, way more than what you actually do. Dont focus so much on being a "programmer". Don't bring up in conversation how much you make or your status. But dance around that you are a man of power in your work.

ThrowingMyslfOutther · 2015-07-24T20:02:32+00:00

My question: Any ideas for masculinizing programming and being a male programmer in the modern era?

[Serious] Why?

alpha-game · 2015-07-25T01:06:56+00:00

i honestly would worry about it, and would focus more on being able to join the 1K club for lifting.

How much can you squat? How much can you deadlift? How much can you bench?

By virtue of being a masculine man, you can have a super technical hobby, and that makes you a walking juxtaposition. But don't be concerned or embarrassed about this, walking juxtapositions confuse the hamster, and it makes the pussy tingle.

redpilldude · 2015-07-25T05:38:29+00:00

Dude, who gives a shit that you're into programming?

Just lift, get ripped, and learn game. Become an Alpha.

If you become Chad Thundercock, women won't give a shit that you're a programmer.

Microfuzz · 2015-07-24T12:48:23+00:00

I've got 2 suggestions.

One: kick ass at your job. Regardless of your field, if you are an ass kicking, name-taking, meeting leading, opportunity taking kinda guy, men and women alike will respect you. Don't be the douchy fake guy looking to "get ahead", just be the best at what you do and take opportunities when they come to you. Also, use your skills to volunteer in the community. Coding camps, makerspaces, robotics workshops, etc. etc.

Two: women love men who can build, fix, solve problems, and do stuff they can't. Think sexy mechanic, not nerdy computer geek. Take pride in your skills and demonstrate that you're a knowledgeable son-of-a-bitch. Don't go building her an entire PC on the third date, but take opportunities to help her with small things. If you're not a grovelling wimp about it she'll love it, especially if you try to teach her to fix it herself instead of you doing all the work.

Hunter2isit · 2015-07-24T16:10:12+00:00

A program architect at google makes $150,000 A MONTH I am sure you can find a way and not be a BB

polyethene · 2015-07-24T12:01:19+00:00

Call yourself an app developer not a programmer, and definitely not a computer scientist or software engineer

H42 · 2015-07-24T14:49:49+00:00

The less specific you are about what you do, the better. Be careful to avoid causing her perception to shoehorn you into perceived "provider role". Just joke about what you do for a living in an oblique way.

fx-115es · 2015-07-25T01:37:30+00:00

Cars are for bitches. Try motorcycles

Gamezob · 2015-07-24T17:50:25+00:00

Makes lots and lots of money

Title	How can I make programming attractive or masculine?
Author	awalt_cupcake
Upvotes	14
Comments	81
Date	July 24, 2015 9:29 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3efej2/how_can_i_make_programming_attractive_or_masculine/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-can-i-make-programming-attractive-or-masculine.151543 https://theredarchive.com/post/151543

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