How to calm down (LTR)

Kobinks · 2019-10-23T03:50:49+00:00

You should be constantly improving your SMV and maintaining low level dread yeah, if you're not moving forwards you're moving backwards.

By accepting the fact it's just her turn and it will inevitably end, this allows you to truly just enjoy life and relationships for what they are.

Enjoy your LTR mate, just don't take any shit off her, don't ignore red flags, don't become a beta and end it when she stops making you happy or hard.

best of luck.

theherosmyth · 2019-10-23T06:53:58+00:00

AWALT means all women have the hypergamous instinct in their firmware, just like all men have the desire to spread our seed in as many women in our firmware. Not all people are slaves to their instincts though.

The whole point of TRP is to take a peek behind the curtain of intersexual dynamics so you can operate from a position of improved clarity, not to become a cynical fuck who tosses in his own windows so nobody else can.

Don't put yourself in a position where you'll be raked over the coals should you two split, but otherwise enjoy your relationship.

Can she cheat or whatever? Sure. But don't we learn here that YOU are the prize? Thank her for revealing that she isn't worth your time and move on to better things.

Snowaey · 2019-10-23T13:15:48+00:00

Mostly green flags

Doesn't matter how many green flags there are, if there are a couple red flags, that's enough to end it.

Don't use green flags to rationalize red flags.

surgeon97 · 2019-10-23T07:29:54+00:00

Never act out of fear, TRP is here to make you a stronger version of yourself not fearful of female nature. Sounds like you're good bro, this is personal stuff a lot of guys (myself included) deal with, best of luck

ForeverNandrolone · 2019-10-23T13:26:34+00:00

What works for me is knowing that I can get another girl easily.

I’ve spun a bunch of plates and know that if we break up that she can be replaced fairly easily.

Also, maybe experience with being broken up with? It hurts like a bitch but you get over it. And if it’s happened to you a few times before then you get over it pretty quickly.

Fromstatepharm · 2019-10-23T03:41:02+00:00

If you really believe that it’s just your turn you should be okay with enjoying it while it lasts.

vyrulence · 2019-10-23T09:46:35+00:00

As you've described it you're literally between the anger/depression phase of RP. Those feelings are good, it means you're making progress, pretty much everyone who swallowed the pill and isn't emotionless did go through your phase.

What /u/Kobinks said, but don't just break up because AWALT and that she won't hold your hand when you're on the deathbed in 60 years. Keep working on yourself and your mission, have a few more plates/LTRs and the anger/doubt/sadness will go away.

If you're really worried about her fucking you over the best thing to do is to NOT overtly communicate and enforce boundaries to see more of her true colors, which makes it easier to spot red flags. But to be honest when YOU are the prize and you're not cohabitating/are married/have kids this shouldn't matter to you anyway.

Also it's important to keep re-reading RP over and over again, especially in the beginning. I've had some phases where I said "Alright, that's it, I know EVERYTHING about RP" and stopped consciously thinking about RP - let's just say it's crazy how fast one can fall back into old habits.

You're on the right path, keep at it dude.

BusterVadge · 2019-10-23T13:05:42+00:00

Anxiety and fear are created by your mind creating imaginary scenarios about the future. The solution is to live in the present.

Will she fuck you over in the future? Maybe. But live for today, not for something that hasn't happened yet and may never happen.

Try taking up meditation. It works.

trpppp123 · 2019-10-23T13:12:20+00:00

I may have something similar in this instance where I feel like I can't truly enjoy my LTR because of the things I've learned and I always seem to be keeping one foot out the door even though things are good. I wonder if it's something that just passes with time.

masterpiece00 · 2019-10-23T13:37:23+00:00

Sounds like you are still quite beta and blue pilled, and secondly she will pick up on this insecurity about her and in turn will probably do the thing you are afraid of when she locates a chad dick.

LSDparade · 2019-10-23T14:59:14+00:00

As long as your own value is above hers, you'll have barely any issue. Just keep improving yourself always!

ToraChan23 · 2019-10-23T13:18:19+00:00

Don't let her get into a position where she *could* fuck you over if she wanted to.

That_Deaf_Guy · 2019-10-23T12:40:20+00:00

I'm in the same boat. Had 3 plates, green flags everywhere with one of them, decided to drop the other 2 and LTR her. Now I can't get over the fact that it's going to inevitably end.

Keep your SMV high, apply dread (this is essential, the dread keeps her around). My LTR knows she wasn't the only one I was sleeping with at the time and she brings it up every so often. If they know you have options, they'll put YOU on a pedestal.

livingInSimulation · 2019-10-23T05:38:59+00:00

Never commit. Never

Plasticannihilation · 2019-10-23T03:59:31+00:00

Maybe she keeps those friends around by sleeping with them.

Maybe she is damaged goods which is why none of her exes thought of her as marriage material.

She thinks you are dumb enough to date her, you will probably cross the line with her.

She knows she has zero, a good estimate of options that will ever marry her, you seem to be stupid enough to give her hope.

You were suicidal, and you ended up in a bad codependent relationship with a crazy chick for rebound, it happens.

Her all habits are new, she developed them recently to keep you around.

Title	How to calm down (LTR)
Author	CSauceHockey
Upvotes	52
Comments	37
Date	October 23, 2019 3:39 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/dltlt9/how_to_calm_down_ltr/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-to-calm-down-ltr.292358 https://theredarchive.com/post/292358

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