This post will be long. Really long. TL;DR at the bottom

I found this sub while lurking on DB (Deadbedrooms). I have been with my wife for about 11 years. Im 31 and I am in terrible shape. My wife is out of shape as well. We have 2 kids together.

I used to bitch and moan about my wife not "giving me sex" often enough. I had the BS conversations about the lack of sex for years. I was doing 90% of the house hold chores. Showering her with gifts. I just couldn't figure out what the hell I was doing wrong.

On top of all of this I talk ALOT. I talk about every single aspect of every single thing that I think and do. To sum up: I am the Beta Messiah.

I found this sub about two months ago. It absolutely changed everything for me. I understand the things that I am reading here. I am reading "The Rational Male" and most of the other requiered reading. I have dropped about 25lbs which would be impressive if I wasn't already over 400lbs. (Started the year at 425. Down to 382).

I applied for a new better paying job and it is litterally next door to a gym. I start both at the first of September. My wife knows that I am doing this, obviously. She also knows that I wrote a plan (which she hasn't read) that I read every morning to keep myself motivated. She also knows that I am reading to improve myself. She's not quite sure what, as I have managed to keep my mouth shut.

Here's the deal. All of these changes are external. I want to start on the internal stuff. I want to start to change my thought process and be able to make some positive changes in the bed room and in the house as whole.

Where should I start? I don't want a script. I am the Beta Messiah here. These things are ingrained DEEP. I don't want to sound Alpha. I want to be Alpha. Its gonna take months if not years to work off the fat. If it takes that long to change Beta to Alpha then so be it.

I understand the theory. I just want something a little more practical and concrete. Thank you.

TL;DR. Super Beta Married guy. Started losing weigh. Got a new job. Wants to focus becoming Alpha mentally. Need a some practical advice.