Monk mode update: Going full-on cold turkey on multiple chronic addictions? Possible? Anecdotes?

nietzschesoboe · 2016-08-08T04:27:16+00:00

I watched a video recently on addiction that made the claim that addiction is caused by chronic unhappiness: link. So just trying to go cold turkey on your bad habits is not going to work, because they are the main sources of happiness in your life. I think you have to replace them with something else. And it seems like the things that makes most people happy are connections to other people and purpose. So make an effort to really engage with friends, and start some sort of passion project. Once you have those things as a scaffolding, making other life changes will be easier.

Edit: I have had success with the above in my own life. I felt bad, so I ate, so I was ashamed of my body, so I isolated myself, which makes me feel worse etc. I found that really throwing myself into my studies and actually making a real effort to hang out with and really connect with people whom I respect, even when I felt like crap, was the first step to breaking the cycle.

pocketriki · 2016-08-08T11:59:29+00:00

I already posted on your thread last time and told you what I am going to tell you now. It seems like you spend a lot of them and energy planning an idealized version of your life and yourself, so much so that you are rejecting the possibility of failure. You need to start with small goals and work your way up to see what is liveable. Getting in shape is a good first goal, you can start just by counting calories and tracking stronglifts with the app. That's how I started, I missed workouts and I ate shitty sometimes but I tracked it. If you're like me, you'll like seeing charts and graphs of your progress and committing this habit is a constant reminder of your goals. I don't binge eat shit anymore and I do 3 workouts a week, I'm not ripped but I feel happy about my progress and where I'm going.

You can stop watching porn, tbh I still glance it stuff occasionally, but I never fap to it. Read Models by Mark Manson if you haven't, he suggests limiting masturbation to once a week and thinking about a girl you have actually met and want to get with. It's supposed to encourage you to actively meet women instead of replacing desire with porn.

I have fixed those two things in my life and I think they were just as bad as anyone. Don't worry a ton about planning, there is no life changing moment that will put everything into place, you just have to do what is right every day even when you don't want to. But try focusing on a few important things instead of everything all at once.

notmyusualreddit · 2016-08-08T04:34:40+00:00

If I'm busy I can ignore any of my habits. If I'm bored, I'll make up excuses to indulge.

Example.. I used to be an energy drink addict. Went on a 3 week vacation where I didnt even think or remember to have caffeine. Got back, bored during my commute, back on the habit.

You need something else to do and think about other than "don't do that thing you like doing!"

tthrowaway- · 2016-08-08T08:27:34+00:00

Stopping addictions is difficult. You will fail, that's normal, don't be too harsh with your self, and quit them again as soon as you can.

Best way is to take new habits. It takes a few weeks to get new habits, this will replace your old ones. Easiest is lifting, go lift man.

Carb addict: don't buy shit food, only proteins and good fats, some white rice is ok. Go low carb it helps a lot with cravings. Do some cardio also, it will reduce your anxiety which is a trigger for your cravings.

Meditate and breath deep. It helps also.

exemptme · 2016-08-08T08:29:08+00:00

This is exactly how you do it

ErikTheRedPill · 2016-08-08T14:19:36+00:00

Read Superhuman by habit.

Not everyone can change everything at once. But if you focus on replacing one bad habit with one good habit, and do this every few months, you'll succeed.

Also water fasting straight from a shitty diet isn't going to work. People who succeed at shit like that already have killer willpower (a finite resource).

Frigzy · 2016-08-08T11:33:47+00:00

You're focussing on the wrong thing. Addiction is caused by a lack of purpose or meaning, combined with an addictive substance. However, as long as you lack purpose or meaning, ANY substance/activity can become addictive.

What I suggest is that you turn your whole idea of progress upside down. Forget about not binging or indulging into your usual highs. Seriously do not spend any time or effort into trying to fight them. However, spend your time and energy into finding a larger meaning or purpose in your life. What do you want to live for? What do you want to contribute? What do you want to look back on at the end of your life and be proud of? How do you see a fulfilling life for yourself?

An activity that can help you achieve this is an acitvity that is uncomfortable to you. For instance a sucky job. What will happen is that you will start becoming creative about ways to get out of there.

Of course this is not a necessity, but the key is to give yourself the time and space to think and be creative. This does mean that you will need a place free from distractions in order for you to be alone with your thoughts. Also writing down what you like, what you're good at etc is a good way to narrow things down.

I've done all these things since I've quit gaming and weed and I barely touch either of them anymore while working on several fulfilling long term goals. Ask if anything's still unclear.

Title	Monk mode update: Going full-on cold turkey on multiple chronic addictions? Possible? Anecdotes?
Author	RP-Truth
Upvotes	6
Comments	9
Date	August 8, 2016 3:48 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/4wob64/monk_mode_update_going_fullon_cold_turkey_on/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/monk-mode-update-going-full-on-cold-turkey-on.109424 https://theredarchive.com/post/109424

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