Rejected by girl at work..

aguy01 · 2014-07-08T23:16:04+00:00

Keep talking to her like nothing happened. Own it when anybody asks you about her. Act you like you are always hitting on girls and have no problem being rejected.

korewarp · 2014-07-09T00:15:39+00:00

[permanently deleted]

unethical_pirate · 2014-07-08T23:00:50+00:00

Read the title and a couple of line, was in the process of writing don't shit were you eat and there it was at the end.

Don't doubt yourself so much, you knew the answer already. Just be professional. For future reference if there's a hot girl you work with just be your normal red pill self, don't make her your friend, build sexual tension but don't take it further. Then if either of you ever leave just take her for a goodbye drink and some goodbye sex.

MarriedRP · 2014-07-09T00:06:43+00:00

If you get all worked up because a girl turned you down, you are in for a very sad life. Get off the computer right now and go to the mall and ask 10 girls out. Get turned down 10 times. Get over it. Repeat.

You are worth enough to at least be flirted with by the hottie at work so I don't think you're a total loser. And I've seen plenty of total losers snag girls above their level.

How do you proceed? Keep flirting with her, but keep it in check. Nothing that is over the line, nothing that will land you in hot water with HR. It's a good skill to have to have in your toolbox.

theozoph · 2014-07-08T23:14:09+00:00

DGAF. You have to become outcome independent. You asked her because you thought she'd be interested, but she's not, no big deal. Plenty of fishes in the sea. Let go of the "pissed" feelings, they will make you awkward.

It's natural to feel you've been led on, but realize you let yourself be led on. It's a learning experience, treat it as such. Continue talking to her as if nothing was different, and think of her as a bratty little sister you kind of like. If she ever tries to flirt again, chide her about being a tease, but only if you can genuinely find it funny how she thinks she can manipulate you. Otherwise, calmly call her on it and tell her you'd like her to refrain from doing that around you.

Most important, see other girls. She's only special if she's your only opportunity. Beware oneitis.

AlphaAsFAQ · 2014-07-08T23:15:52+00:00

act like nothing happened

Never shit where u eat I guess

You answered your own questions.

She flirted with you for validation, all women are like that (AWALT).

caxica · 2014-07-09T06:56:32+00:00

Don't ignore her. Just slowly and subtly engage with her less and less. Keep it professional but don't show any indication that you were bothered by what happened.

pupplenupple · 2014-07-09T11:52:40+00:00

Why would she flirt? Same reason men who are naturals often flirt with women they aren't trying to sleep with, gay men flirt with women, orderlies in retirment homes flirt with the old biddies. To practise, because it feels good, for the ego boost of seeing someone react, boredom, often the target enjoys it.

Are you still suffering significant levels of crush/oneitis? If not, then there is no need to change anything. You asked her out, she's busy with another guy, its all cool, totally understandable, if she mentions it just smile and say "well of course I asked you out, I thought you were single, and you're hot" and then shrug and leave it at that. Your frame will look just fine if you can make it seem like asking a girl out is no big deal to you, just a spur of the moment thing and not something agonised over.

If you are still suffering crush/oneitis (and not just ordinary lust) then you'll need to do something about that

kingofpoplives · 2014-07-09T13:04:04+00:00

why the fuck would she even flirt with me if she's seeing someone

She's the female version of a player and has you marked for orbiter-ship. Having orbiters at work is a great way to get favors and special treatment on the job!

You should withdraw your attention, but stay polite and cordial in the work environment. Make it clear that because she is sexually unavailable to you she gets treated like any other male coworker.

DianaDewAsmr · 2014-07-10T08:36:43+00:00

Whenever I rejected someone I was flirty with (guilty of that in the past...) and I saw that person just move on with their life and not show a little bit of embarassment I was like "Whoa, what a guy, he must certainly have lots of stuff going on/I should've given him a chance".

Title	Rejected by girl at work..
Author	Larocko
Upvotes	8
Comments	23
Date	July 8, 2014 10:46 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2a6r23/rejected_by_girl_at_work/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/rejected-by-girl-at-work.140643 https://theredarchive.com/post/140643

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