Texting with LTR

princepeanutbutter · 2016-02-11T16:10:37+00:00

Important to know the reason for rules so you can implement appropriately.

You're an awesome guy. Of course you are or she wouldn't want to be with you. Texting does not convey your awesomeness. Even if it does a small degree, too frequent of texting is frequently putting out a diluted version of your awesome self. No good.

Next is texting is easy validation. It makes you more accessible. If you're too accessible for her validation, you become less valuable and easier to take for granted. Because hey, you're always there. And most importantly it eats away at the incentive for her to take time out of her to actually drive over to see you and cook for you etc.

Personally I will respond to daily check ins but keep things short, maybe a dozen lines between us. Check ins don't always come daily and that's fine. I will rarely initiate texts, more of a 1/4 rule for me. This keeps me available but she knows she only gets the fully attentive me by actually being there.

This isn't about manipulation or gaming your girl it's about leading her. She wants to do something that will ultimately be bad for the relationship but she doesn't realize it.

Devilsalwayscry · 2016-02-11T13:18:29+00:00

It doesn't really matter as long as you don't come off as clingy. Don't give her everything on a silver platter though.

p00nbrigade · 2016-02-11T13:28:40+00:00

Text her to make plans etc. Encourage her to call you on the phone if you she needs to talk to you. Tell her your too busy to always be texting. Even though your probably texting her while doing something else that's much more interesting to you, in her mind by texting her your still giving her unlimited access to all the attention she wants.

cholomite · 2016-02-11T15:14:24+00:00

Stick to the 2/3s rule, especially when she is behaving well, she should be rewarded with a little attention and validation. Drop it down to 1/3 or 0/3 if she stops working to please you. Just don't go over the top mushy or lovey and always respond using less words than her.

I'm in a LTR too and it's impossible to only text for logistics if you're the primary person in her life. A couple back and forth texts through out the day is perfectly fine if she spent most of last night cooking and sucking your dick.

7Fig · 2016-02-11T20:14:03+00:00

There is way to much thought on this. If you are available and she sends you a message of substance then respond when you can. If she is just rambling on or throwing out little questions this is where it can get spooky. Essentially it can turn into a digital leash. She sends you a message and you are forced to respond or she scolds you or pouts about it.

Set the standard now that you will text her when you want to, not every time she expects you to.

Title	Texting with LTR
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	6
Comments	8
Date	February 11, 2016 1:01 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/458n4k/texting_with_ltr/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/texting-with-ltr.160620 https://theredarchive.com/post/160620

Comments