Tinder/Bumble game feedback?

jb_trp · 2017-04-20T18:25:23+00:00

I've been single for about 3.5 years and I've gone on hundreds of Tinder dates. It's simple:

When you message first, don't just say "Hey." Say something specific about their picture or profile, hopefully something witty and clever. Maybe tease them a bit or make a joke. And then always ask a question (e.g. "Oh gosh, you're a UK fan? How much do you hate Christian Laettner?"). It doesn't matter what the topic is, just make it interesting and easy for them to respond.

You should be clever enough to message a handful of times on Tinder. If they don't respond or aren't very friendly, just stop talking to them. They are a waste of time. The goal is to generate interest, build a small amount of rapport, maybe test to see their intentions, and then get their number. Every girl on Tinder likes to fuck, just some are less forward about it than others.

To get their number, I won't ask for it. I'll usually say something like, "You can text me if you promise to not be crazy" and then just give them my number. 9/10 times they text right away.

After you get their number, you want to arrange a meetup within a few days. Anything longer than a week, unless they're out of town on vacation, shows a lack of interest and is a waste of time. I'll usually ask them what area of town they live in and pick a beer or cocktail place convenient for them. Some women will want to just come over to your house, which is great, I've had others just invite me to their house saying they'll be naked in their bed "pretending" to be asleep. This is the exception and not the rule.

After you meet, don't be a creep. Focus on body language that shows confidence. Don't cross your legs or arms, head up, shoulders back, focus on eye contact. You've got to read the situation, but usually at some point I'll go for a kiss close. Even if I'm not getting many IOIs (some women are hard to read) I'll try to kiss them as a sort of "hail mary." Sometimes going for the kiss shows enough confidence that the move itself will generate sexual interest. Other times they shut you down, but who cares? You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Even if you're worried the girl might be "out of your league," just go for it and let her decide. Sometimes I'll kiss them at the bar, sometimes not. Often, I like to isolate them before trying for a kiss. A good move would be to suggest to go for a walk to sober up and then try for a kiss, or to just walk them to their car.

It's not uncommon for women to want to bang on the first date. Choosing a place near their house (or your house) really helps with this. Sometimes they'll bang you in the back of the car. I don't really plan these things, just go with the flow. At the point of suggesting to go back to her place (if she hasn't already) you might get some LMR. Blow up the shit test and you'll probably get laid. Like, if she says he house is a mess, just tell her you have a hard hat in the back of your car, so you're not afraid. Whatever.

Be sure to keep condoms in your coat. I'm shocked at how many women tell me that they have an IUD (like, all of them), but I don't trust them and I don't want to catch anything nasty.

Cheers, mate.

Kommanderdude · 2017-04-20T15:56:14+00:00

A girl that I dated for a few months from tinder told me she would never go on a weekend date with a tinder guy because (1) She was usually going out with friends and (2) she couldn't use work as an excuse to leave if it sucked. She said if the date/meetup sucked she would just say she had to be up for work early and needed to leave.

corsega · 2017-04-20T15:47:32+00:00

I like to pick her up as it keeps you together when you leave wherever you met. Seems like a girl that wants to drive herself is already putting up walls.

This isn't the 1950s. No one picks girls up on dates anymore.

I suppose it depends somewhat on where you live.

HookersAndBlow4ME · 2017-04-20T16:14:41+00:00

"soonest success I've had is second date" REALLY BRO?? you're giving advice and you haven't even banged a tinderella on the first date? I'd say HALF of the tinder/bumble dates I go on (all hb7's+) have been first night bangs. Go out for drinks or shoot a game of pool, kiss her as soon as not creepy - like within the first 5 mins, and then back to my place to see my awesome pad. Wham bam thank you ma'am.

Title	Tinder/Bumble game feedback?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	2
Comments	16
Date	April 20, 2017 3:11 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/66ib4n/tinderbumble_game_feedback/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/tinderbumble-game-feedback.215797 https://theredarchive.com/post/215797

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