(x-post from r/AskChodes) Why Get Married?

livingthedreamnow · 2014-09-19T20:01:51+00:00

Was married for 12 years. Been in a good LTR for a couple years now, and I'll tell you that without a doubt, there is not a single thing about marriage that makes it "worth it". In my case, I have worked extremely hard, and earn a very large salary.

Analogy time: in marriage you lock yourself in a guillotine and hand the rope to a woman in hopes she never pulls it. In a committed non-married LTR you and her both choose to put your heads under a guillotine, and you each hold the other's rope. This dual risk in non-marriage LTR's has a great way of keeping both of you invested, because you both lose the same way if the ropes get pulled. In marriage, she can yank that rope anytime you don't toe her line, she gets bored etc, and keep your skull as a prize as she skips off to the next. Sure, not every woman in a marriage will pull the rope (so many will) but, do you want to live your life alone in the guillotine, vulnerable to the one with the rope in their hand? When I think about this analogy, I wonder to myself how the woman can maintain any long term respect for the poor bastard under the blade....

No matter how you look at it,,, modern marriage with the "no fault" ejection seat is the most foolish thing a successful man can do. It's like playing Russian roulette, or sending cash to the Nigerian Prince who sent you an email.

tombreck2 · 2014-09-19T18:09:35+00:00

Love: the feeling you get when you don't think you can do any better

AFPJ · 2014-09-19T18:36:21+00:00

having trouble seeing how the legal benefits of marriage outweigh the potential financial and parental costs of divorce.

That's because there are no legal benefits to marriage unless you earn $150K+ and want a stay-at-home wife.

Then the benefits become a small tax break ...with the risk of alimony for life and losing half your shit.

Like I said, there are no benefits to marriage.

lonGterMgoalS · 2014-09-19T19:22:09+00:00

If it's not for you then no reason given will be good enough. Spinning plates isn't for everyone. It gets old. For every one old man that is doing ok, there are 1,000 that are alone and lonely.

Some people like tradition and don't see only the negatives to marriage. Actually the only negative I ever see here is divorce. That's not a good enough reason for some of us to not get married. Shit can always go bad, with anything.

Tom_The_Human · 2014-09-20T00:45:20+00:00

There is no benefit to marriage, apart from the odd tax break (dependent on country).

Overall, it's definitely more trouble than it's worth.

LS_D · 2014-09-20T02:11:58+00:00

The time when marriage was an institution that 'locked in' people to each other for life (imo, this was an effective way to deal with women's hypergamous nature) has long passed

Today, marriage is primarily for banks as no-one pays their bills as conscientiously (and on time) as a married man with a 30yr mortgage and kids!

It is an anachronistic tradition which is now slowly being seen for what it is!

There are no real benefits from becoming married ,, they are illusory at best!

I think /u/livingthedreamnow's guillotine metaphor is perfect ♂ thanks for sharing that bro

lalicat · 2014-09-20T03:24:06+00:00

I'm in an awesome marriage with an amazing woman and besides the fat tax return (if she doesn't work) life's great but it's not worth the risk.

Title	(x-post from r/AskChodes) Why Get Married?
Author	etcomro
Upvotes	6
Comments	14
Date	September 19, 2014 5:50 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2gvovr/xpost_from_raskchodes_why_get_married/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/x-post-from-raskchodes-why-get-married.142261 https://theredarchive.com/post/142261

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