Im going through a breakup at the moment, about two and a half weeks ago. I've gotten over a lot of the initial hurt, and after a bumpy week of on again off again uncertainty I've accepted that if there is any chance of getting back together with her I need to at least get my own shit together.

I hold no grand idea that we will get back together one day, nor do I want to in our present state. She was unhappy and controlling, and I was being unhappy and controlling right back. It was a dysfunctional relationship, but I can't help but remember how much our interests dovetailed: not necessarily our hobbies, but we both enjoyed a great night out and were always willing to try new foods and wines and bars, we were both quirky oddballs in private, we were both animal lovers and passionate vegetarians. I remember all these things and how amazing it felt to have a partner who was so in line with those things. But, she hated my friends, said terrible things about them, and often would take it out on me if I hung out with them. For these reasons and others, it finally came to an end.

That's all backstory to my real question, which is how soon is too soon to get back out there? I truly don't want to hurt her and I think she wants to get back together down the road, but I also know that part of my recovery is going to be getting out there to meet, and date, new women to see what sort of lifestyle is truly for me. But is two and a half weeks too soon to start stepping out there and making approaches? I feel comfortable doing it except for this nagging sense that I should still be mourning the relationship to the same intensity that it seems she is, should be trying to fix it to the same degree she wants to. She has no close friends in our city at the moment, and I am overwhelmed with guilt because of that fact, and in a way it is keeping me from trying to move on.