It’s shit.

This post isn’t meant to be revolutionary but lately the hot question is “online dating isn’t working for me!!” Newsflash greenhorns, for a lot of us, it doesn’t!

It’s in favor of those who are interested in cock. Yes, gay guys have it easier than us too. My gay friend has fucked more ass in the last year than I ever will in 10

TL;DR Go outside you fucks, turn off the phone and turn on some girls

I’m sick as fuck right now otherwise I’d be working then going out and trying to meet people tonight. SO before you call me a fucking loser typing this on a Saturday night you can eat my muddy ass.

I’m currently fucking a HB7 (she got me sick, she had a cold now I’ve got it) and about to fuck a HB9 next week. Humblebrag sure, sue me

So with “credibility” or the sorts out of the way:

What can someone notice about you on Tinder?...

Maybe you look good, workout, dress good, neat smile and hair, and you are social-but social how often? Maybe you are weird and creepy or aggressive though. Maybe you don’t have a big friend circle. Maybe maybe maybe. Would you look at that you present yourself in such a mighty fine way but yet your audience still doesn’t know SHIT about you

What can a girl notice about you in real life?

Maybe the way you walk. Or how you communicate, making others’ faces light up you can instantly make friends with anyone. Maybe you’re witty, funny and enjoyable to be around. You’re touchy but in a respectful and friendly way. You have a loud empowering and assertive voice. You are expressive and have a piercing gaze. Maybe you smell good. You show interest in the other people talking, giving full attention. You ask engaging questions. You’re sweet but also a tease.

See the complete difference between the two lists? On Tinder you’re like an advertisement, a book cover. You might raise a few eyebrows but people won’t know the whole story. And after getting a read on your surface qualities...there’s so many questions that are unanswered.

In real life you can be an open book, and express 100x more the qualities of yourself than any online dating app can. You can still be mysterious while being the type of guy girls want to be around.

Just uh, don’t be that fuckass-douchenozzle who moves from girl to girl trying to pickem up. And if you’re worried about Tinder and shit then I suppose that last sentence won’t even apply to you since you’re too much of a pussy to go out and try your luck anyways.

Tinder and Bumble and PenisInVagina.com or whathave you for online dating is not in your favor. Use it on the side but go make real connections with REAL PEOPLE. Less flakes that way too...just saying :)

Go get em ya fucking jabronis.

Oh and reminder to stop jerking your cock off. At least limit yourself to once a week. You horny neanderthals