Any good tips on not beating yourself up about not approaching?

Sad_Farm · 2020-12-11T17:08:01+00:00

Never worry about something thats out of your control, its either A you can do something about, then you do it, B if you can't, then why worry. But remember regret is a lot worse than rejection I promise you that. You'll never have to wonder what if. Use that feeling to motivate you next time. Take it as a lesson learned.

NickaTNite1224 · 2020-12-11T20:09:10+00:00

It sounds like you’re using covid as an excuse. If you stop approaching and use that as a crutch the only way you’ll learn is if things get so bad for you that you will be forced to change or face absolutely dastardly consequences.

I think being hard on yourself is yourself telling you that you screwed up. Keep Approaching dude

BurnItDownSR · 2020-12-11T20:12:07+00:00

You should feel a little bad for not approaching, if you were 100% guilt free about it then you'd have no incentive to do it over and over again so you'd only attempt it in the rare instances that a girl you just can't resist crosses your path.

Thats like trying to shoot a single basket once a month. Unless you're already good with girls, you aren't gonna get far doing that.

What you don't want to feel bad about is what other people would think of you for not approaching because you don't want to let other people's thoughts or opinions dictate your actions. As long as you feel bad because you feel like you're failing yourself and not failing in the eyes of others, you're good.

Wanna stop feeling bad? Don't chicken out of an approach on days when you decide you're gonna do some and an opportunity presents itself. You mention covid restrictions, make sure its an actual restriction that stops you and not fear or doubt.

As long as you're doing it for yourself, feeling bad when you don't do what you're supposed to do and feeling good when you do do what you're supposed to do is healthy.

Neil1398 · 2020-12-12T06:12:50+00:00

Man I’ve been approaching for a while now and still miss opportunities. I even missed a cute girl today but hey it is what it is.

If you’re talking about approaching in general, you just gotta force yourself until you get to a point that you start gaining momentum and it becomes a habit.

Choose a time and take a walk everyday same path and do your thing. I never feel guilty about not approaching because I constantly force myself to go outside and do it especially when I don’t feel like it. Now actually approaching every girl I find attractive that’s another story lol.

Just walk the same path same time(better if you’re in a big city) and approach one girl a day. Make it easy for yourself and build your way up from there.

RaRaKINGRJW · 2020-12-11T17:42:01+00:00

Take it as a lesson

UnusualLight0 · 2020-12-12T15:41:50+00:00

the mentality I had to drill in my brain, again only speaking for me, was these women are rooting for you. Women want to meet a confident, sincere, and smart man. They would love for you to be that man. Even if she has a boyfriend, that woman probably won't be upset if you approach her like a human being. She'll likely feel good about it, because she'll know men still are attracted to her, and it help her confidence likely. It is win for you because you know that woman wasn't for you, she is taken, so you won't have any regrets.

Men mainly regret the approaches they never made, not even the bad approaches hurt as much. As long you try to meet that woman, maybe you like her, maybe you won't but if you try, no shame there.

8CrispyBiscuits · 2020-12-13T19:49:56+00:00

Don't beat yourself up. Relax before you approach. Its always a good idea to buy a drink, or appetizer and send it to her table. Let her enjoy it and you can try walking right up to her before she leaves. Ask her if she enjoyed it. Start with light talk, and develop from there. At a bar, if a seat opens up next to her, sit in it! Ask if that seat is taken, ask if you may buy her a drink. Give plenty of space! Dont bother her, but you can ask simple questions to get a conversation started. If she is not responsive at first, do not give up. Give her some space or time and try again. Pay attention to her body language. Is she closed off? Has she looked your way more than once? Did she smile at you at any time? Or did she turn her body or chair away from you? Do not continue if she's done that last one. Hope this helps. You can apply this to many different settings or scenarios. Library, etc. ~ a little advice from a lady.

Title	Any good tips on not beating yourself up about not approaching?
Author	NunyaBidnizz68
Upvotes	20
Comments	7
Date	December 11, 2020 4:36 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/kb64t6/any_good_tips_on_not_beating_yourself_up_about/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/any-good-tips-on-not-beating-yourself-up-about-not.1506951 https://theredarchive.com/post/1506951

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