Cold approaching

KingNardDawg · 2020-05-26T18:33:20+00:00

I've always found commenting/complimenting on something unique about her/that she's wearing to be a pretty solid opener.

hunterpua · 2020-05-26T19:38:41+00:00

Situational
Drive-by compliment
Opinion opener

Situational - Make a comment about what's happening in the moment or what you observe about her.

Ex. You see her watching a street performer, lets say its a really young kid doing something very impressive for his age.

You can stand next to her watching the performance as well and say, "Woah. That's amazing. And he's so young!"

Or lets say you see a woman trying to figure out what drink she's gonna get at a cafe. You can say, "I'd go with the Creamy Chocolate Shake. Its really good."

Drive-by Compliment - If you're walking and you see a girl you like, compliment her but continue to walk in the direction you were originally going in.

If you're next to a girl you like or a girl you like passes by, give her a compliment but don't try to progress beyond that and put your attention back to what it was on before you noticed her.

A lot of people in seduction recommend against compliments for all kinds of reasons but basically because they believe that compliments typically don't have a positive impact on your ability to seduce a girl.

There is some truth to that but the reason why women don't go for a guy who compliments her is because that guy is usually just using that compliment as a bribe.

He isn't just appreciating her for the heck of it. He's complimenting her so that she'll like him or so that she'll give him 5 minutes of her time or whatever.

Its similar to buying a girl a drink. Its a drink with all kinds of strings and expectations attached. It isn't just a drink that she can freely enjoy and not feel obligated to do anything in return.

When you give a drive-by compliment its not a bribe, its legit because you're gonna leave or not try to do anything more.

Here's the thing though, once she realizes that its a legit compliment she will typically be very appreciative or for women who are used to getting compliments as bribes it might even shock her and make her want to have an interaction with you that she is more used to.

So the responses will range between a very happy "Thank you!" to a girl being the one trying to make conversation with you. Only then should you stop walking away, turn to face her and engage her in a conversation.

If she doesn't seem particularly warm then just continue walking. She's unlikely to be interested anyway.

Opinion Opener - You might be familiar with this one because its almost 20 years old and was mentioned so many times in The Game but you don't have to script an opinion opener. You can just ask someone's opinion on the fly.

Lets take the example of picking out drinks from the first one but lets say you're the one who doesn't know what to pick and there's a cute girl next to you, just ask her.

You can also be out with a friend and having a discussion like say, what's more damaging, drugs or alcohol, and you guys are really getting into it, people around you sort of understand that you guys are debating something and there just happen to be some girls behind you.

You can just turn to them and ask them what they think about the issue.

...

This part is for everyone reading this comment

A lot of you have sent me direct messages asking for my advice because you read a comment I made on this sub, just like this one, and found it to be very helpful/insightful/meaningful and I'm happy to say I've been able to help you guys so much more because of that.

Here's the problem: More and more messages are coming in and I really want to help but its getting hard to keep up.

So I've put together a Facebook group for you guys that want to improve your dating lives and want to actually understand the psychology behind our interactions with not only women but with ourselves and people in general.

If you want to be part of a group that believes in finesse over brute force, technique over strength, smart work over hard work, Seduction over pursuit then click on this link and request to join.

If you are serious about getting better with women then I'll be happy to welcome you in.

gruntledjoe · 2020-05-26T18:27:29+00:00

Just do it. Fail multiple times but keep trying. Only one way to become great at something

silverbird666 · 2020-05-26T22:59:50+00:00

You sound like a beginner, and based on your question there is one thing that I absolutely want to point out:

Never use pick up lines, never use any fancy openers. A simple hello in combination with a legit smile beats every opener and every pick up line on this planet.

comicsandrecords · 2020-05-26T19:27:46+00:00

The best way to cold approach is to try to warm it up a bit beforehand. Look at her for a second and smile and/or nod your head. The response to something like this tells me how strong I should come on. No response or doesn't look, I should go for it but not that boldly. Positive response, I assume she wants to date me already and approach with that level of cockiness. Bad response, I don't approach. When I do actually approach I try to be as present and in the moment as possible. Take a deep breath, feel my body standing taller, and my shoulders relaxing. Think about the specific thing that's attracting me to her, and confidently look her in the eyes, say hey/hi/hello, and compliment that thing.

I've had great experiences doing this. Mostly rejections, but that's how all cold approaching is. Very very few *horrible* rejections. And a handful of great responses. Like great dates there on the spot at a nearby park of coffee shop. Or making out only a few minutes in.

Title	Cold approaching
Author	EfraimTkT
Upvotes	2
Comments	16
Date	May 26, 2020 6:21 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/gr2ggv/cold_approaching/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/cold-approaching.1496310 https://theredarchive.com/post/1496310

Comments