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[–][deleted] 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]mostlysanemildlymad2 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
In a professional setting I do know many women. I work with them and even from time to time have a coffee with them. However, it’s purely platonic and because of that I feel fine. However, if there were to be even a hint of something other than just that, I know I’d clam up like a rusty bear trap.
[–]revente 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Practice.
[–]mostlysanemildlymad1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Indeed.
[–]Dodechaedron 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Look at the human being behind the body you are attracted to
This is easier said than done, my friend. And besides, I’m not always attracted to the body. I can find beauty in many places.
[–]antoniaalexandria 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Have you tried talking to women through Reddit just as practice. I’ve done this with a couple of guys to help them get more confident.
[–]mostlysanemildlymad 5 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
No. How would I do that? Apologies. I’m not that familiar with how Reddit works.
[–]antoniaalexandria 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
There are some subreddits specifically for talking and making friends with people. I’d be happy to talk to you myself too. Feel free to message me
[–]igcasanova 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You remind me of a friend.
A good looking guy at exactly your age, who deserves to date hottest girls ever, but has never overcome the shyness issue.
I am only 32, but I broke through that issue 6 years ago.
My advice to you if I may is to dedicate time to it. If the problem is big enough and the pain is real, dedicate real amount of time to it.
Put yourself in a position where there is nothing else for you to do but this.
What I did 6 years ago, was go to a foreign country with only one goal, try to meet and date a lot of women, each day I did not, felt like failure, something I could not ignore.
I thus advice you do the same. Pick a region in the world where age difference is not important and where there is a better abundance of hot women, go there for at least a month.
And do just this, eat, sleep and go on dates. Use everything in your arsenal, online dating, daygame, nightgame, make this your profession your obsession.
Once you start getting results, your social anxiety will magically go away.
Another thing before you do all this, quit porn and coffee, seems irrelevant, but you have to trust me on this one.
Feel free to get on a free coaching call with me https://calendly.com/igcasanova/free-call
Vinny IGCasanova.com
Thanks.
[–]rhofire 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
So, let me get this straight.
You're in your mid 40s. You want to get back into dating. But, you lose confidence once you're in front of a real live woman. Is this correct?
Here is the thing. Based on your description, you can succeed at attracting the woman you want. Or multiple women for that matter.
As you said... There's always a but...
It comes at a price. Most men your age give up. If you do succeed, there'll be backlash. In most likelihood, you'll become more successful than many men half your age.
Our society doesn't know how to deal with that. Neither will your circle of friends. Yeah, it's easy to assume until it becomes a reality. But, it's a different thing when you have a slim, curvy, woman with red lips, and lusty eyes hanging on your arm then going off to the bar to get you your favorite drink.
Here's the deal.
At this point, it's either you go all in or you join the ranks of disappointed losers. There's no middle ground. You'll either have spectacular success ( and be disapproved by a lot of people you know ) or you wait till some lonely woman stumbles along and you both settle.
Choose now.
Thanks. Interesting perspective. I guess I do give up. It happens once and I’m crushed. I have very little if any resilience.
[–]rhofire 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I have very little if any resilience.
Well, here's the thing. Checking all the boxes doesn't mean anything. These are just the boxes the media and society make us believe we need to check. I'm sure you've seen people who have no trouble with women yet some view them as losers.
The actual criteria... that's a different story. But, it's neither politically correct or easy to swallow.
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[–]mostlysanemildlymad2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]revente 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mostlysanemildlymad1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Dodechaedron 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mostlysanemildlymad1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]antoniaalexandria 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]mostlysanemildlymad [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]antoniaalexandria 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]igcasanova 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mostlysanemildlymad1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]rhofire 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]mostlysanemildlymad [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]rhofire 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link