Date Breaking Away from Kiss?

Plastic_Friendship55 · 2025-04-15T09:25:23+00:00

Making it clear that you don’t want a hookup is a mood killer. Making agreements of how a eventual relationship will be before you even know the person is self sabotaging. Keep things open for the natural flows. Very many relationships and marriages actually begin with a hookup. Even if you do t want a hookup, don’t say that.
Her past relationships is something she should handle and not effect your dates. Don’t worry about her past. Focus on the present.
Never wait until the 4th date to escalate to a kiss. That should be done on the first date. You are wasting a lot of time and exposing yourself massively to being friendzoned by waiting that long.
If she doesn’t signal interest and desire, respect that and move on. If you have your shit together you’ll have plenty of other options.

The reason things aren’t happening is because you are self sabotaging

Flame_Knife · 2025-04-15T08:07:14+00:00

No one is going to be able to tell you, you have to ask her directly, without appearing too weak. You’ve been on a lot of dates and at this point it sounds like she’s pulling back. If she is pulling back, don’t chase her, as it won’t help. You can be direct and just talk to her.

Tell her “Hey, I really enjoy spending time with you..

I can’t tell you how much (something you did together) made me want to push you against that wall and put my hands all over you

But I can’t tell if you want me to? There’s no worries or pressure at all.

Obviously don’t be weird, but have eye contact and remember that she does like you. You will be able to tell from the way she looks at you, and just follow that instinct. If she says she does want to kiss you, she may be wanting you to take more initiate and you would benefit greatly from being a little more exotic when kissing.

For example, if she says she does want to kiss you, back her against the wall and slowly push her against the wall gently while you’re kissing. Pick her up and throw her on the bed. Slowly bite her lip, throw her around, slowly make your way to but her ear etc. It’s a creative thing really.

If she doesn’t want to, just listen and talk, don’t be desperate and be chill. She may need more time and felt like it was too rushed, that’s possible, maybe something else. Maybe there’s some trauma.Who knows, but we can’t tell ya!

For example, literally a “can i slap your ass” with a wink has had great success for me. (vibe depending) Basically be assertive while also making sure she’s comfortable.

ImpossibleBritches · 2025-04-15T10:14:44+00:00

Why don't you ask her?

Ignore the dudes who say that being honest is an attraction killer.

Get into a mental space where you have no attachment to outcome (desire without desperation). And just talk to her like an adult.

On the couch ask "Is there a reason why we aren't making out right now? I like the idea of that. How about you?"

Ask with genuine curiosity. Like, actually be curious and not "trying to get somewhere".

If you are genuinely curious, then she'll open up, and you can both talk about what you want.

If that sounds counterintuitive, then consider this:

Ultimately your success in dating is a function of character. Women respond intuitively to character. The routines and the other crutches will only get you so far.

You've got an opportunity for character growth here:

Have a shot at being the man who can have these kinds of conversations because he is unattached to outcome and comfortable with his desires.

The worst thing that you find out she's not interested in taking things further. Which should be fine.

garnageman · 2025-04-15T21:51:24+00:00

dont ask us ask her bro

Title	Date Breaking Away from Kiss?
Author	Tragedyofthe
Upvotes	8
Comments	4
Date	April 15, 2025 7:25 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1jzlukp/date_breaking_away_from_kiss/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/date-breaking-away-from-kiss.1549651 https://theredarchive.com/post/1549651

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