Dealing with being expendable from girls perspective

TheMinistryOfAwesome · 2016-04-24T11:01:09+00:00

You know, I see this kind of post a lot and it grinds me a little. The problem is this:

you're not actually following the advice of this community. you're simply looking at the results that you want and then having a pretty half-assed push at achieving them and then failing. Once you fail, you use that to reinforce your own negative view and then come for comfort in seddit.

Go out and work on yourself. If you have to compare yourself to everyone else, then let me ask you these things:

Any guy that has a great girl, do you reckon he was the first one to hit on her?
Do you think having a vast pick of the the dudes actually helps her really? If they're all little bitches who are running around her so they can convince her what a wonderful guy they are until she caves and lets them fuck her? Is her life really being improved by all of those orbiters?
Do you thinks he has her pick of the guys she is most attracted to? (your answer should be no) and why not? Because they have their shit together and are captaining their on ship in the sea of life.
Which kind of person are you? Which kind of person do you want to be?
You are expendable to every single person who doesn't rely on you for life. That, however, is a spectrum. I think you know how to combat that - most people are expendable to you. The ones you might consider non-expendable are perhaps those who you love.

Let me ask you this:

In the past week, what have you done to make yourself better? To put yourself above the crowd, or something that has made you feel better about yourself/happier?

ThrowawayPUA · 2016-04-24T12:41:09+00:00

I cant help but think of how many dudes have already hit on her

Yeah, and how many of them made awkward approaches and left a bad impression? She remembers them. They make you look even better in comparison.

IpickupGrandmothers · 2016-04-24T15:21:54+00:00

Why is your sense of self-worth tied to strongly to female approval? Why is it coming from a place of codependence, rather than a healthier, "I'm awesome, you're awesome, let's be awesome together"?

I think when you're at a point in life where you realize that female approval will never make you happy, you'll have a much easier time not going after it. Unfortunately, this is one of those things that someone has to experience firsthand for them to understand it, it's not something you can learn from some dickhead like me on the internet.

and how to combat that?

People always look for external entities to fill their internal void. Maybe it's food, drugs, sex, money, whatever. But no external object will ever fill that void. That has to come from within.

What would make you jump out of bed in the morning, squealing with glee that you get to live your life? What kinds of dreams or passions have you let go of because it wasn't manly, or it was too childish, or it wasn't realistic, or whatever?

I combat feeling expendable by not basing my self-worth on other peoples' opinions. That doesn't mean I go out of my way to be an irreverent asshole or anything; it just means that I live my life by pursing my passions, having meaningful friendships, being with my family, and all that other kinds of shit that people forget about as life starts kicking them in the balls.

johnny_hamilton · 2016-04-24T07:18:17+00:00

Seriously man? I'm not sure if you're being sarcastic. Wow I guess its part of the game?

DirkDieGurke · 2016-04-24T08:17:36+00:00

They keep coming back tho.

LiberalPenguin · 2016-04-24T09:04:51+00:00

Once you leave the fake world built up by our society where we are supposed to think relationships are something that should last forever, and you should do anything to make it work...youll be a happier person.

Realise that you can leave anything behind at any point. Be with someone if they make you happy. But dont hesitate to leave once they make you sad. There are ALWAYS new people to meet and experience life with. Only keep the ones that are precious to you.

johnny_hamilton · 2016-04-25T02:32:11+00:00

Wow I appreciate the feedback guys. There's a lot I realize I can control, and just need to have a better effort and attitude about them.

Dirty30matl · 2016-04-24T07:02:12+00:00

I have realized that I am expendable to my wife. I have zero value to her. It's difficult bro but you have to realize that they are of zero value to you. You can live your life without them and be way better off.

You choose to have them.

Title	Dealing with being expendable from girls perspective
Author	johnny_hamilton
Upvotes	6
Comments	12
Date	April 24, 2016 6:57 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4g77qg/dealing_with_being_expendable_from_girls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/dealing-with-being-expendable-from-girls.1405837 https://theredarchive.com/post/1405837

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