I love him so much but...

cobraCL · 2022-08-16T11:29:06+00:00

I get the underlying principle of your post, but the comparison to sexual violence and domestic abuse is off-mark.

Abusers condition their targets over months or years into believing they are worthless, deserve their abuse, and that they should consider themselves "lucky" that someone even given them the time of day. They provide an irregular reward system (alternating horrific abuse with adoration and tenderness) to form trauma bonds of neuro chemical emotional extremes. It is essentially Stockholm syndrome: The victim knows the situation is abusive but is too broken down, mentally fucked or scared of violence to leave. The brain's next way to cope is to romanticize the situation to create an illusion of ownership. Female on male abuse works no differently, but society shames men for speaking up the way a woman would.

It is true that a woman who wants to be with you will overlook many of your human faults or things that are not ideal in your personal life.

However - Women who stick around despite serious red flags (pathological lying, infidelity, emotional and physical abuse) usually have serious issues themselves and are drawn to the same dysfunction they witnessed in childhood.

Liberaler · 2022-08-16T09:50:25+00:00

This is true, but does not apply to the initial phase, when she does not even know you and nothing has happened yet. In this phase flaking in many cases has nothing to do with you, but intervening factors in her life.

nanoepoch · 2022-08-17T00:20:33+00:00

You should always avoid anyone with serious red flags.

ImAGhostOooooooo · 2022-08-16T11:57:43+00:00

Are you really comparing DA and SA to you not getting a second date? Seriously? Insensitive much?

texaspete3 · 2022-08-20T16:30:48+00:00

this is a weird post. Relationships are hard, and they take constant work. simple as that. Its not as easy as i want to be with them.

Title	I love him so much but...
Author	Prestigious_Cake3706
Upvotes	0
Comments	9
Date	August 16, 2022 9:12 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/wppiij/i_love_him_so_much_but/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-love-him-so-much-but.1251905 https://theredarchive.com/post/1251905

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