[deleted by user]

PimPedOutGeese · 2022-05-03T13:59:20+00:00

Everything you mentioned is the problem and also the answer.

I feel a bit too needy, I don’t have any friends, nor do I have many hobbies taking up my time. Most of the time I am available.

Stop being needy. Even if you don’t get friends you should find some hobbies you are passionate about. Let them take up a good portion of your time.

I notice the more time I hang out with my girlfriend the less affectionate she gets. I’ve approached her about this and she denies it

She isn’t going accept accountability on pretty much anything so don’t expect her to acknowledge a down falling anywhere. Instead you need to stop being so needy. Ties into the first point you mentioned. You need something else, besides her, that takes your time. Video games. Collection. Building something. Instruments. There are plenty of option and you can take your time and find what works for you. I am an avid fighting game player and stick collector.

resulting in me just wanting to take my distance so that I give her time to miss me, only issue is that she works 6 days a week, and with only 1 day off she chooses to hang out with me one week and the next hang out with her mom and cycle it this way.

She will make time for you if she wants to be around you. You are making it difficult to because you are indeed needy. Do you see a trend here? This makes vaginas dry up faster than water and bounty. What she had found initially attractive in you isn’t there anymore because you are being….. well I don’t need to say it. You already know.

Weeks after she brought that up I told her I would be seeing her less and biweekly and she got so upset and said it was very unfair. I eventually reminded her that she was the one who brought up that idea initially and that’s when she calmed down and was okay with it.

Shit test. She’s going to test you like this more and more and it’s going to get worse as long as you are needy. She knew she brought it up she wanted to see how you would respond to her being bitchy.

I feel like a b**** and I hate feeling this way.

GOOD! You should! Not because I’m an asshole… but because that feeling brings change. You don’t like how you’re feeling then you need to change it.

I don’t know where else to look for tips on how to rebuild this attraction.

So you already know what’s wrong here… Get a hobby and let her go. Don’t be so serious. She is going to do what she wants anyways regardless. The question you need to ask yourself is with the current relationship and how it’s going… is it right for you?. It sounds like it isn’t. You’ve tried talking to her about it and it hasn’t changed. Why stay?

If you’re gonna stay try getting a hobby and taking your distance… not giving her distance at her request. That means not being readily available to her. Not returning phone calls/text right away. Maybe even turning her down every now and again to meet up. You need to show her that she is NOT number one in your life. Your purpose/hobby/whatever else is… but not her.

agileipa · 2022-05-03T13:37:50+00:00

No don’t delete. Just because you are in a relationship doesn’t mean you stop seducing your girl.

PHVEDO · 2022-05-03T18:09:56+00:00

She lost attraction. Start caring for yourself and she will care for you. You are needy because she is your life. Get a life, go to the gym do something you find interesting in your own time.

nikgos · 2022-05-03T14:14:42+00:00

It seems like you have lots of free time which is a great opportunity for you to develop as a person and do some self-improvement work. Start working on yourself and fill the days in which you don't spend time with her with things that you might enjoy or always wanted to try where you'll meet new people.

Once you start doing this your girl will either get curious about you and she'll naturally start gravitating towards you more than she currently is or you'll realize that you don't want her anymore as she is not satisfying your emotional needs. Either is a W in my book. What's an L is staying in the exact same situation expecting things to change because they won't.

Just as a sidenote. If you start working on yourself don't do it for her do it for yourself. Good luck!

Codename-Misfit · 2022-05-03T15:34:08+00:00

Read a book, watch a movie. Not only will you be able to put your time to good use, you'll have something to talk about when you meet your girl.

You could also try working out freestyle. All you need is a floor and I suspect it's right there next to your bed. A couple pushups, a couple squats and lunges will pump you up.

If you feel like stepping out, go to a park by your own. Watch the birds, tell her how this one pigeon won't stop shitting on you.

Maybe you could use Duolingo and teach yourself to say ' you are looking beautiful ' in French or Spanish.

These things can be done all on your own. I hope this helps.

RepulsiveCat1681 · 2022-05-03T13:50:01+00:00

hey man. from my POV i think perhaps you are thinking about the bigger picture too much. In short you should give her a reason to WANT to spend her time off with you. Forget about the fights (unless they are things that hurt both of your cores that haven’t been resolved, in that case you need a long chat), assuming they can be shrugged off. Plan something super nice with her, think of some killer convos to have, spoil her a little (not w/ $, w/ <3) & then treat her some more 🙃😉. ALL relationships have ups and downs, this statement is proof in itself that something can be done. BUT if you think theirs something wrong with the mechanics of the relo, you’ve come to the wrong sub. sry hope this helps

NewEdgeRyan · 2022-05-03T16:19:54+00:00

sounds like maybe she's getting a little too comfortable with the schedule shes put you on? and yes you are a little needy but dont take offense to that, ive been the needy boyfriend before. Just sit down and ask yourself what you really want in life, and if it involves her or not

Avocado_99 · 2022-05-04T02:46:42+00:00

I didn’t read it

PainDevourer · 2022-05-03T13:30:16+00:00

Maybe try relationship_advice? 🤔

MistyMaisel · 2022-05-03T17:15:42+00:00

Do you have a job? I feel like this might be part of why you have time to be needy if you don't. And also why she's kind of treating you like this. It quasi-sounds like she's the man in the relationship. And if that's the case, it at least semi-explains why she's telling you when she's available to see you. And it would explain why she's upset when you tell her you don't have time for her. If you aren't doing anything else, why the hell don't you have time for her. (If you catch the logic there).

2022-05-04T07:55:10+00:00

"I feel a bit too needy"

Go with that...get a hobby and make some friends or you're going to drive her fucking crazy and push her away. Needy is gross!

I've dated needy women and it's such a turn off. This is all on you! Fix it before it's too late.

Don't fucking talk about it with her either! Jesus!!!!! The last thing you need to do is create conversation about your insecurities and neediness, just fix it! She doesn't want to hear about your needy issues. This doesn't have to be a thing.

I wanted to vomit just reading this. You triggered some PTSD in me. It really is disgusting to date someone that's needy.

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	9
Comments	32
Date	May 3, 2022 1:19 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/uhfy1h/i_need_relationship_advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1260574 https://theredarchive.com/post/1260574

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